It used to be that when you thought of outlet mall shopping, things that came to mind would be shapeless clothes, factory-second linens, and orthopedic shoes. Don’t worry–you can still get that kind of stuff here, but Albertville Premium Outlets is marketed as a “premium” outlet center. The center is owned by Chelsea Premium Outlets, a chain of outlet malls around the country that boast of having designer outlet stores for label-conscious shoppers at discounts up to 75% off every day.

This outlet mall put Albertville, MN on the map

Okay, well, that can be true, but let’s cut the BS.

Some may say that this is an excellent place to find deals; others will say that this place is a last ditch effort to screw the consumer until they send it to TJ Maxx.

Me? I’m on the fence. You can get good deals here, but you have to have done your research and know what you’re buying. Leave your “sale goggles” at home — don’t just buy something here because “you’re at an outlet” and “it’s on sale.”

I kind of think the whole concept of outlet malls is a bit misleading. Just because it’s an outlet store doesn’t necessarily mean an automatic bargain or super deals, although it can be done.  If  you shop at the regular locations of many of these stores, you’ll see that the merchandise you’re buying at the outlets SHOULD be cheaper because the items are of lesser quality and were never sold in the normal stores in the first place. Basically, you’re getting what you pay for.

All of the TV ads and billboards feature a pretty fashionista doing some shopping, all decked out wearing her best heels and pearls. Oh please, get a better photo! It’s an OUTLET MALL for crying out loud.  I have yet to see people shopping here who look like  they’re going to the Guthrie. When I was here the last week, I saw a 400 pound lady wearing stonewashed jeans that were so tight, I bet she was itching yeast.

I have no idea when this place opened – I never personally visited (or even KNEW about the place) until 2004. I couldn’t find any information on it – but they added many more shops in the early ’00s, making the outlet mall more of an all-day, blow-your-entire-afternoon shopping destination. I’m assuming before that, it was a small outlet center, much like the North Branch outlets or the like the old Woodbury outlet mall (a major shithole, if you ask me).

It’s easy to miss the exit if you’re coming from the Twin Cities. Just follow the billboards, and take the first (and only?) Albertville exit and you’ll be fine.

For fuck's sake, they have a CROCS store!

The Stores

I’m not going to list out all the rest of the stores here. I am lazy and that’s simply too much work.  You can go to their website for that. One thing to note–according to their website, Wilson’s Leather is still here. Wouldn’t surprise me any; they’ve had their “going out of business” sale for the last 10 years.  I know there’s been some store closings in this mall, but I only know of a few. The only former stores I can think of are the Barnes & Noble outlet, the Bose store, and the Bombay Co. outlet.

Most of the stores here are your typical Joe Schmoe outlet mall crowd pleasers, such as:

Jones New York
Liz Claiborne
Kitchen gadget stores that sell oddball stuff like avocado slicers and potato peeler gloves
Casual Male XL
Izod
Calvin Klein
Van Heusen
Brooks Brothers
and so on.

When I shop here by myself, I have only a few stores that I check out. Those stores include BCBG, Lucky, Nike, and the following…

GAP:  I have a sneaking suspicion that a lot of this stuff was churned out a basement sweatshop in a third world country. Plus, so much of the stuff here screams, “That is SOOO 10 years ago.” Yeah, not even “so last

I think I had this same GAP denim shirt back in 1998. 20% off of a denim shirt from 11 years ago does not a deal make.

year.” They’re pulling out all the stops here and going back an entire decade. This is where people are still buying those ugly GAP logo sweatshirts. If you’ve only visited a regular GAP store in a mall, you’d think they were put out of their misery in 1999, but no. These suckers are out on the racks in full force at the outlet.  You can even find tapered leg jeans here (GAP Outlet calls them “Classic” jeans, so head’s up. You don’t want to be wearing Mom Jeans, do you?)  Racks are chock full of weird sizes – lots of XXXXXL sized shirts and Size 2 Extra Short pants. I think they spray all their clothes here with GAP “So Pink” perfume, because I swear, if I buy something from here, that scent follows me home. Don’t expect to get really good deals here either (though it CAN be done. I’ve purchased clothing here for $0.97 before!). Example – on their “clearance” rack, a $32 sweater was marked down to $28. Bitch, please.

Banana Republic Factory Store: Oh boy, quality can be a big issue here. If you actually think you’re getting “real” Banana Republic clothing that was in the store last year, you’re wrong. I’d say 90% of the stuff here is made specifically for the outlet. It might look familiar, but chances are, it’s “off” in some way. For example, I bought a cute dress at the regular BR store. The next season, I saw the same dress at the outlet, except that instead of the silk material on MY dress,  it was cotton. And unlined. Yet, the outlet was claiming that their dress should be “compared to $160″ (original price of my dress at the regular store). Claiming a cotton dress with no lining to a silk dress with a lining to be the same price, just because the pattern and style are the same is pretty damn deceiving. Just know what you’re buying, and don’t overpay for the Banana Republic name, that’s all.

Coach: I consider myself a really good shopper. I rarely buy anything that’s not on sale, so when I say that you can get good deals at this store, I damn well mean it. Now, you’re not going to get good deals EVERY TIME you go in here. Oh no. You have to hit up this place at the right time. Don’t ask me when that is because I honestly don’t know. It’s hit or miss. Yes, they do make bags specifically for the outlet, but no, they are not inferior or ‘factory seconds.’ I’m pretty familiar with Coach and I notice no difference in quality between the bags at the outlet vs. the bags at the full-price store. Word to the wise – do NOT come here for the Midnight Madness sale on Black Friday (don’t even come to the outlet mall on that day, for that matter). You will be sorry. My sister and I made the mistake back in 2006.  Be prepared to sit on I-94 in bumper-to-bumper traffic for several miles, just to get into the parking lot. Then, you’re going to wait in more lines, just to get into the stores. We got in line at 12AM at Coach and didn’t get in the store to shop until 2:45AM. At that point, you feel like you must buy something to justify the long wait. Pure HELL. Never again!

Other info (and things to be wary of)…

Like every mall, Albertville has the decoys — stores located at outlet centers that aren’t really outlets. I don’t care for such tomfoolery - don’t let the following stores trip you up!

Bath and Body Works: Medford and North Branch have the REAL outlets. (And it’s worth it because you can score some great deals! It’s like a year-round Semi-Annual Sale!)
Aeropostale
Justice
Maurices
PacSun
Old Navy – yes, this USED to be an outlet, but Old Navy converted all of their outlet stores into regular stores within the last year or so…..there might be more too. Watch out!

Then they have the stores that really raise an eyebrow, like Maidenform, Jockey, and L’eggs/Hanes. The fuck? Why do we need an outlet store for drugstore underpants? Are people THAT clueless? You can buy that shit at CVS, with a BOGO coupon.

Speaking of coupons, this mall, as well as any other Chelsea Premium Outlet centers, offers a “VIP” coupon book, though there’s nothing VIP about it. All you do is log on to the website, register with your email address, and print out the coupons. See? No secret handshake needed. I strongly suggest doing this, as many of the stores offer pretty decent coupons through this avenue.

Despite this place calling itself a “premium outlet”, it is severely lacking in the designer goods. BCBG, Banana Republic, Coach, and Lucky Brand are about as high end as this place goes. You won’t find Burberry, Prada, St. John, True Religion, or Gucci outlet stores here. That’s because we are hicks here in Minnesota and we don’t know what Prada is.   Maybe I’m just a snob? Really, I’m not – I did drop $100 during my trip to the mall (oops) — but it would be nice to have that option. I look at it this way – if I’m going outlet shopping, I want to have the chance to buy stuff I wouldn’t normally buy. I’m not driving all the way out here looking for a discount on Maidenform bras.

If you are looking for designer stuff, may I suggest the wonderful Saks Off-5th Outlet in downtown Minneapolis? I kind of wish I still worked downtown — I used to stalk the sales racks over lunch back in the day. I once scored a pair of Jimmy Choos for $30!

I really think this place is poorly designed. Because if you want to ‘do’ the entire mall and start out at the Old Navy, and make your way all the way down to the Nike Store, you’re going to have one hell of a long hike all the way back to the car.  When I go here, I always hit up the same few stores and just drive to them. However, this plan can be a pain in the ass on the weekends because of the congested traffic. Plus, there’s a bunch of stores across the street too — “The Promenade”. I don’t usually bother with the stores over there, except for BCBG and Lucky, if the mood strikes me. They do offer a free trolley that tootles around around the mall, stopping at designated spots, but I’ve never bothered to try it out.

Word to the wise – there is no food court, which is kind of a shame because many people who come here end up spending their

Looks like the invasion has begun. Someone call Will Smith!

entire day here. They have a Subway on one end of the mall, a TCBY yogurt way on the other end, and a Dunn Bros Coffee on the other side of the road. There’s also a free-standing Burger King. That’s pretty much it. Oh yeah, there’s a oddball restaurant on the service road leading up to the mall called “Space Aliens Grill & Bar.” The fuck? For the love of god, why is this in Albertville, Minnesota of all places? It ought to be located in Area 51 or Roswell, New Mexico.

Much like the Mall of America, although to a lesser extent, this can be a hotspot for tourists (mostly due to our no sales tax on clothing). Every time I have friends visiting from out of state, they always want to go to the outlet AND the MOA. It can be a complete zoo here on the weekends, especially during the summer. During the week, it’s a ghosttown. And watch it – don’t plan on spending a summer Sunday afternoon here because you will fight the coming-back-from-the-cabin crowd on I-94 and you’ll be smoldering in traffic for a while.

As far as outlet centers go, this is as good as it gets in Minnesota, so if you’re up for a day of outlet shopping, go here & don’t bother with the other outlets (Medford and North Branch). Just do your research before you go and have realistic expectations -  yes, it’s an outlet mall but if you’re thinking you’re going to find cocktail dress for a penny, you will be sorely disappointed.

Enjoy the rest of the photos! All photos taken Feb. 2009.

A tacky Banana Republic outfit made specifically for the outlet. Let’s be real – an elephant logo sweatsuit would not fly in the regular store.

Just because it’s located at an outlet mall doesn’t mean it’s a REAL outlet store

Store Directory

The Presidents Day Sale

A lot of times you're better off shopping at the regular stores

Coldwater Creek...A fashion DON'T, unless you're 60.

More hot shopping action!

Play Area

Outside the Coach store

I WISH I'D NEVER BEEN BROILED!!!

I'd like to get a pair of Coach sunglasses, but they didn't have any that were big enough. I like sunglasses, with white frames, that are as big as my head. Seriously. I probably look ridiculous but that's how I roll.

See, this is what I'm talking about - here is the Banana Republic Factory Store. I shop at BR a lot, and I KNOW these items were NEVER in the "real" store.

I don't care for all the splashy logos, but I like the color

Some of the stores across the street

I keep going back here and I often have to ask myself, "Why?!"

Coach or not, you couldn't PAY me to carry a fanny packs. And at only 30% off? Fuck, who are they trying to kid?

I insist to people that it was a nice area in which to grow up, but not everyone these days believes me. Rightfully so. The area has gone to pit.

But in the ’80s, it was nice. Even in the Zane Avenue area. Village North, you haven’t been forgotten!

Village North wasn’t just any old strip mall. Architecturally, it looked like a strip mall, with the shops arranged in a linear fashion, but it functioned more like a regular mall.  It was always busy, you could walk the interior of the mall, they held events like craft shows, and by golly, even Santa paid his yearly visit.

Yep, these ugly townhomes replaced Village North. This particular building style can be found in just about every suburb of Minneapolis. Someone stop Ryland Homes before they take over the metro.

I joke about tearing places down and building condos, but really, that’s exactly what happened to poor Village North. They tore it down sometime in 2003, and by 2006ish, up went a bunch of cookie cutter condos/townhomes. I really don’t know how bad the crime got in the mall – I last visited it in 1998, and it seemed safe enough then.

I apologize for the lack of OLD pictures. It’s not like I didn’t try! With the exception of the Circus Circus pics, all I have are current pictures of what the area looks like today.

You’d never know a landmark strip mall once stood here.

Now it looks like they’re trying to turn Zane Avenue/Brooklyn Blvd into another Plymouth, manufactured city center and all.

The Stores:

I listed these by location – from one end of the mall to the other. This is entirely based on memory, and I could be wrong. Please let me know if you have corrections or additions by emailing me or posting in the comments.

Korner Plaza: Closed in 1987. It was some sort of department store. I believe they sold juniors clothing, toys, and inflatable rafts.  Rafts? Yeah, random, I know. But my mom bought my brother and I each an inflatable raft to use up at the cabin. So they sold outdoor sporting goods too. Go figure.

Minnesota Fabrics: Korner Plaza became Minnesota Fabrics at some point.

Some big pet food store. Not sure if it was a Petco or what…? I can’t remember if  the pet store took over the spot of Minnesota Fabrics when it closed or if they coexisted next door to each other in blissful harmony.

Circus Circus: For us ’80s kids, this was the main draw of Village North. No, it was nothing like its Vegas namesake – this was not a fleabag motel & gambling establishment – it was a kid-friendly arcade. It was just like a Showbiz Pizza or a Chuck E Cheese — greasy pizza, a band of singing mechanical beasts featuring one hella scary gorilla, arcade games, skeeball, bumper cars, tickets redeemable for shit prizes, and the signature dark, dreary decor that gave this place a sinister feeling.

This Circus Circus location had a big ball crawl right near the entrance.  As adults, we all know it’s a bacteria farm. Unless they hired a Hazmat crew to come in to fumigate and sterilize every hour, if you went into the ball crawl, there was a pretty good chance you were going to come out with a rash and a case of the whopping cough. But at least Walgreens was right down the hallway, so you could pick up some Robitussin before heading home

My family at Circus Circus, April 1988

Sometime in the ’80s, Circus Circus remodeled and expanded. I’m not sure when this was, but it had to have been prior to 1988, as the photos below show the new & expanded dining area. The old dining area turned into some sort of sports bar with a bunch of TVs. It was separated from the main dining area by a glass wall (smoking was allowed in this area). You rarely saw families eating in this area; only really, really creepy old men hung out here, drinking beer and and chain smoking.  The guys in here creeped me out – if they want to drink beer and watch the Vikings, why not go to a bar? For pete’s sake, Blondies is right down the road. Yeah…that’s because today, these same men are probably on Dateline’s Chris Hansen’s shit list. I believe they kept the animatronic show in the old eating area, at least for a while.

The new eating area was much larger than the old digs – and had a 3-ring circus style Rockafire Explosion show! (The old stage only allowed the main band). The animatronic show would just start out of nowhere, scaring the crap out of everyone. Being serenaded by a rat cheerleader, a possum in a trash can, and a scary ass gorilla lip syncing Beach Boys songs while eating greasy pizza was every kid’s dream.

They also installed this glass box that looked like a telephone booth inside the eating area. It was used for birthday parties – the birthday boy or girl would go into the box, the Circus Circus mascot (a scary clown with a huge head) started up a fan and a bunch of tickets would fly around in the box. Your job was to catch as many as you could before the time ran out. All kids were envious of whoever the birthday kid was, regardless if you knew him or not. Because WE WANTED TICKETS. They were our passports to treasure, redeemable for a giant Styrofoam pellet teddy bear, a terrycloth wristband, or a plastic yo-yo!

Elegant family dining at Circus Circus. I'm missing from this picture - I was probably off getting a disease in the ballcrawl. My dad is missing too, but he's probably the one snapping the photo - April 1988

When you ordered food at the counter, you were given a number and instructed to watch the monitors for your order to be ready. While we waited for our pizza, Mom and Dad set us loose in the arcade to play games, but instructed us to watch the monitor for our number. And this was how my parents discovered I needed glasses. I kept playing skeeball long after our number came up. Mom thought I was being difficult; truth was, I couldn’t read the monitor. I wasn’t a happy camper! I thought glasses were fug. I only needed them for distance, I didn’t need to wear them full-time. Thank goodness too, because – LIKE, WHAT ABOUT FASHION?!

Great American Music. It had a wood store front. All I can remember is that it sold records and cassettes and was located right by Circus Circus. My mom bought Michael Jackson’s Thriller tape here!

Mario’s Movies & Games: Mario dealt in new and used movies and Nintendo/Sega games. So if you wanted, you could sell your 8-Bit NES and games to Mario (but don’t get your hopes up too high if the only game you had was Super Mario Bros/Duck Hunt. You’d be lucky if he’d give you a quarter for it). Too bad eBay wasn’t around in those days. I don’t know if the place was actually owned by a guy named Mario. Probably not. Chances are, he wanted to capitalize on the Nintendo trend and use the namesake of the chubby video game plumber to lure in the hardcore gamer demographic (a.k.a. impressionable 10 year olds). After all, how many MARIOS do you know?

Famous Footwear: Not much to say about this. Though the Village North location is obviously gone, the Famous Footwears of today still look pretty much the same way they did in the ’80s.

Brauns: I HATED THIS PLACE and I imagine if you grew up in this area in the ’80s, you hated it too. It’s where Mom shopped and where kids whined and fussed. Brauns made Mom look like a mom. They sold Mom Jeans, Mom Shirts, Mom Slacks, Mom Vests, and other various Mom Accessories. Hi Mom!

Simeks Meat & Seafood:  I LOVED their samples! They always had a plate of meatballs near the enterance, so while Mom finished checking out at Walgreens, my brother and I would wander over to Simecks to feast on some meat.  The cashier would give us the evil eye and alert her manager to boot us out of the store if we were sneaking too many meatballs. They also sold some really good RAW cookie dough too.

Radio Shack: If Village North still existed in 2009, this Radio Shack location would still be in business. This chain should’ve died sometime in the VCR age, but nope. It’s apparently harder to kill than a  cockroach. I guess there’s still enough demand out there for phone jacks, DC 12V car adapters, and metal dectectors to support this place.

Walgreens today. I believe it moved to this location in 1998

Walgreens: This was one of the busiest stores in Village North. Our doctor’s office was around the Village North area, so this is where we got all of our prescriptions filled when we were sick.  Today, Walgreens is located about a block down the road, in its own stand-alone building.

Sabo Flowers

Some dry cleaning place

Hallmark

A barber shop: Even had one of those rotating barber poles!

A pet store: I’m not sure if they actually sold pets other than fish and birds, because I only remember getting flakey fish food and tank equipment at this store. I can’t remember its name. They had a great selection of pretty colored fish tank rocks too.

Plaster Paradise:  Plaster Paradise was definitely different. They sold exactly what you think they’d sell – plaster. Yep, plain plaster sculptures, all ready to be colored in whatever lead-based paint hues you wish. Painting these spackle statues didn’t require a whole lot of artistic ability.  Sure, you could REALLY go all out with these plastered widgets, but for the most part, anyone could make these suckers look halfway decent, even my 8 year old brother who liked to destroy my Barbie coloring books by scribbling all over the pages using Crayola’s Raw Umber and only Raw Umber.

This craft was kind of like Ukrainian Egg Art for the less talented. They had a huge selection of various spackle statues – you could paint your own knock-off Precious Moments doll or Hummel statuette. Besides the statuettes, they sold pretty much every other dust-collecting home decor item you could imagine – doorknockers, bookends, wall hangings, napkin rings, Christmas ornaments, weapons of mass destruction… All with a completely blank slate for the do-it-yourself hobbyist. They sold all kinds of painting supplies here too – different sized paint brushes and every color of paint you could imagine.  Most importantly, it was MISSION CRITICAL not to leave this store without an aerosol can of shellack. Your precious artwork was not complete until you doused it with a coating of glaze, giving your brainchild a shiny varnish, ready for household display.

Company’s Coming: They sold everything you needed to throw a kick ass party, without the liquor. Company’s Coming was a “mom and pop” version of a Party City. It was a very tiny store, which really is the ideal size of a party store. I don’t get why places like Party City occupy a building as large as a Wal Mart. A party store need not to be that damn big!

Ben Franklin: I wrote about this place in my 10 Stores I Wish Were Still in Business post – basically, it’s a scaled-down version of a Michael’s. I went here to stock up on  embroidery thread for my BFF Friendship Bracelet business.

Northwest Book Store: A Christian book store that sold bibles, Billy Graham posters, Precious Moments trash, and Sister Theresa bookmarks. I didn’t like this place because they didn’t sell Babysitters Club or Sweet Valley High books. Probably because a Christan book store would think  Jessica Wakefield ranked right up there with Judas.

IGN Super Valu: I wasn’t a fan of Super Valu. Or its red-headed stepchild, Red Owl (located across the street). This grocer had two good things going for it: #1: The chicken clucking machine at the front of the store, where you’d put in a quarter, the chicken would cluck to the beat of a nursery rhyme, and when the song would finish, you’d get a plastic egg with a surprise inside…which was usually incredibly disappointing. I once got a “gold” smiley face ring that broke me out in a nasty rash.

#2: They had baggers who would sack up your groceries for you, place them in a plastic numbered bin, and put them on a rolling belt at the front of the store. You’d go out to your car, pull up to the curb, and the friendly stock boy would place your bags into your car. How nice.

Burger Bros: Took over the grocery store location.  Burger Brothers was a locally-owned company that was acquired by Gander Mountain in 1995. They sold sporting goods and had a giant bear in the store. Burger Brothers closed in 1997.

Around Village North:

The area around Village North was quite memorable too, so it’s worth covering.

In the parking lot area:

Arby’s: Arby’s was located in the Village North parking lot. It probably faced a lot of competition from the Rax across the street. In the end, Arby’s won the Roast Beef War and stayed in business long after Rax shut its doors.

An ATM: There was an ATM in the middle of the Village North parking lot. I don’t know why I remember this, but for some reason, whenever I picture the Village North shopping center, I always remember that ATM.

Marquette Bank: This was a circular shaped building with glass windows all around it in the Village North parking lot.

AMF Village North Bowl: Even back in the ’80s, my parents wouldn’t take us to this particular bowling alley. They thought it was really seedy. And it was – I think I only went there once as a child, for a birthday party. As an adult, I went there once in 2003, and got my drink on. Enough so that I sang at the karaoke bar and cleared out the place in 7 seconds flat. I sure liked their wireless microphone… The bowling alley was in the “back” area of Village North. I think it MIGHT have been connected to the mall, but I’m not sure. This was demolished in 2005. To fill the void, Brunswick Lanes opened up sometime in 2006. Call ahead to get your name on the lane list and don’t forget your glock!

McDonalds: This was a nasty, noxious McDonalds, even back in the ’80s. It was a franchised owned, not a company-owned restaurant, so they did things their way, and it showed. They served seasonal items like an orange milkshake months after the other Mickey Dees ceased sales. They never got your order right, most of the time the cold fries were knocked upside down and spilled all over the bottom of the bag, their hotcakes tasted & looked like glow-in-the-dark frisbees, and when you bit into their chicken nuggets, you often spotted a pink, cordlike tail.

Other places around the area:

Heaven help us, it's still here...

Godfather’s Pizza: I can’t believe this dump is still around. The proof is in the photos!

There was also some sort of cowboy/hee-haw/Cattle Company style restaurant located in the Godfather’s Pizza/Century Court apartments/Blondies vicinity. You couldn’t see it from the main drag, and I can’t remember the name. It didn’t last long, and we only ate there once. All I remember is that ties were not allowed, and if you wore one, they make you take it off and replace it with one of those cowboy Randy Travis-style bolo ties — you know, with the ugly sheriff’s star pendant and a leather rope looped through it.

Century Court/Huntington Pointe Apartments: Brooklyn Park’s version of Cabrini Green. Was notoriously known as the ‘Most Dangerous Place in Brooklyn Park” by my

Brooklyn Park needs more slum lord apartments, not fucking PARKS.

circle of friends. You did NOT go here at night! Century Courts was owned by Harv and Marv – 2 notorious slumlords. It was renamed  “Huntington Pointe” in the late ’90s to improve its image. The entire complex was razed in April 2008 and in its place is a park. Like Brooklyn Park NEEDS more parks….

Blondie’s: This bar is trouble – recent murder scene. Nice.

Across the Boulevard:

Ponderosa Steak House: If you’re not familiar with Ponderosa Steak House, please, for the love of god, don’t let the name fool you. Technically, yes, it’s a steak house, but if you’re expecting Ruth Chris’, Murray’s, or even Timberlodge, you will be quite disappointed. Ponderosa tried to pass itself off as a chophouse, but really it was a toned-down version of the Old Country Buffet.  When a “chophouse” offers a smograsboard (with a taco bar) AND a western-style atmosphere, you’re not going to get a prime cut of meat. You couldn’t pop bottles here (no liquor licence), but you could pop buttons – since you could order a steak AND graze the buffet, you buckaroos could really get your gorge on.

Rax:  It was a fast food roast beef chain, similar to Arby’s. This location used to be a Country Kitchen. We didn’t go here very often, because my mom hated this place. I don’t remember much about it except that they had good shakes, the building looked like a solarium with all the windows, and had wicked cool alligator shaped plastic bottles for the drinks. (Don’t get too excited, Rax didn’t have a liquor license either. Can you imagine what fun drinking a cap’n coke would be in an Uncle Alligator bottle? Blondie’s has the liquor license & it’s across the street, but they sure as hell don’t serve moonshine in an alligator glass. If you asked for something like that, you’d probably get a cap in your ass.

Burger King, photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park

Burger King: Closed in 2004. Demolished in 2006. According to the city of BP, there’s supposed to be a medical building up in its place.

Koops Red Owl: Yuck. Didn’t like grocery shopping here either. It reminded me of a small town grocer, especially with the hanging vinyl strips in the freezer sections, that you had to dip in and out of to get your foodstuff. It was a tiny grocery store and we only went here when we were waiting for our pizza to be ready at the nearby Little Ceasers. The fresh produce section was a mess – you really had to watch your step since half of the produce was smeared all over the floor. The fruit looked too nasty to buy, anyway – wormholed apples, peaches so bruised that it looked like they got in a bar fight, and bananas so spotty it looked like they had a case of the herp. Koops is now a Family Dollar.

Little Ceasers, Clean N Press For Less, Cost Cutters: These were all located in a small strip mall near Koops. The strip mall is still standing but the standard Brooklyn Park lineup of a check cashing place and an employment office prevails. I got my first perm at this Cost Cutters when I was in 3rd grade. I was going to write about how crazy my mom was for letting me get chemically-enhanced hair at that age, but these days, 9 year olds are getting botox, so I guess a perm is pretty tame.

Mr. Roccoo is still here!

Rocky Rococo: And it’s still here! Rocky himself looks more Panama Jack than Italian Pizza Connoisseur but hey, whatever works. They have great pizza! For Valentine’s day, pick your lover up a heart-shaped pizza pie and prepared to get laid. Hubba, hubba!

Goodyear Tires: Still around today!

Denny’s: Yep, Brooklyn Park once had its own Denny’s, a soulless, homogenized version of a greasy spoon-type diner. The only time it’s okay to go to a Denny’s is if it’s 3AM and you’re trying to sober up by eating a chicken fried steak after a night of painting the town red. I didn’t eat at this Denny’s much, maybe a handful of times. When it comes to the 24-hour diner type places,  I always preferred Perkins to Denny’s any day of the week. Two words: WISHING WELL. When I eat greasy diner food, I’m going to shit it all out anyway, so by god, I at least want a cereal-box quality souvenir to commemorate the event.

Dunkin’ Donuts: They served donuts when donuts weren’t kool, krispy, or kremey. There were no community service officers directing traffic in and around this place. No reporters from WCCO. No people pitching tents and camping out for a fucking bear claw. Just donuts, no drama. Donuts didn’t become “cool” in Minnesota until the Krispy Kreme in Maple Grove opened in 2001. I’m guessing this place was closed by 2001 but I’m not entirely sure. I know it was open in 1998, but that’s the last I remember it.

Budget Power: I believe there was a Budget Power in this area, across from Village North. Budget Power was a local hardware chain. I don’t think we ever shopped there. All I remember is that the logo had a lightening bolt.

More places

Rapid Oil Change: Rapid Oil Change turned into some car audio equipment store sometime in the late ’90s. Now it’s some place that’s part barbershop, part spinning rims dealer. Not surprising in the least.

The former Rapid Oil Change location

White Castle and Dairy Queen: Yep, both are still standing to this day!

Seedy Strip Mall off of Brookdale Drive: I can’t recall ANY time we EVER stopped here because even back in the day, this place was a little shady. They had (and still have) a Chinese restaurant here. I’m not sure if it’s the same one or not.

Moonraker Apartments: (At least I think they were the Moonraker Apartments. Please correct me if I am wrong). They always had that sign that said, “If you lived here, you’d be home by now.” These apartments were shit even back in the ’80s.

Please enjoy the rest of the photos – all photos (except where noted) taken December 2008.

Feel free to share your memories of Village North Shopping Center in the comments!

The backend of what was Village North

Another view down the Boulevard

Another view of the Godfather's Pizza. It's empty, yet open for business

Woo hoo! Dairy Queen's still around

Brunswick Zone - come for the lanes, stay for the knife fights

Koops is now a Family Dollar...and it's probably just as nasty inside as it used to be

This was the strip mall right by Koops. There used to be a Little Ceasers, Great Clips, and Clean N Press for Less here

A sign for the seedy strip mall off of Brookdale Drive & Zane (right across from the Dairy Queen...and MORE slummy apartments)

Century Court Apartments, pre demolition *Photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park*

Moonraker Apartments

Rocky Rococo sign

Another view of the townhomes

It's no surprise that White Castle survived

Godfathers Pizza sign

With Blondie's reputation, showing the UFC fight might not be a good idea. Recipe for trouble?

Another view of Blondie's

Yates & Brookdale Drive. More icky apartments tarnish the BP skyline