Posts Tagged minnesota

Joe's Crab Shack: Roseville, MN

Eat at Joe's!

Joe's Crab Shack is a sensory experience, to say the least

Installment #2 on Dumpy Strip Malls’ Roseville Restaurant Trilogy – the closed Joe’s Crab Shack off of Snelling Avenue.

So yep, another abandoned building/former restaurant post with complementing photo essay. These places look so sad and creepy when they’re all boarded up & lifeless like this. But, hey, I like this kind of stuff and that’s why I have this blog. I’m the weirdo pulling off the side of the road, taking pictures of run-down buildings & weedy parking lots.

The Joe’s Crab Shack chain arrived in Minnesota in 1999 with two locations — Roseville and Maple Grove. Minnesota suburbanites love their chain restaurants (me included — I don’t mind a chain restaurant, as long as it’s GOOD), but poor Joe couldn’t make it work in this town.  Maybe because of the abundance of Red Lobsters around, there wasn’t room in this town for another french-fried seafood chain? Or perhaps people just wanted to go to dinner to RELAX and EAT (what a concept!) & not have their server bully them into joining their conga line every 15 minutes? Whatever the reason might’ve been, the Roseville location closed in March 2007 and the Maple Grove location shut down in early 2008.

Joe's Crab Shack

The beach-themed Joe's Crab Shack. No, they don't take sand dollars as a form of payment, but it would add a touch of authenticity if they did

The Roseville location is still standing in development limbo, with nearly every fixture still intact, making this former non-stop summer beach bash locale look exceptionally creepy.

The Maple Grove location is now a Broadway Pizza, which is located along the northwest area of Elm Creek Blvd. There’s been a fair amount of restaurant turnover in this particular area.  Former food eateries in this area include Green Mill, Krispy Kreme (which has been completely remodeled and is now a bank), Hops Restaurant & Brewery, and Baker’s Square (being torn to pieces to make way for a strip mall addition).

Unfortunately (…probably not the best choice of wording), I never ate at the Minnesota locations. My only experience with Joe’s Crab Shack was in 2000 in Gurnee, IL after a long day at Six Flags Great America (apparently, at the time, none of us knew that Joe’s Crab Shack had already infiltrated the Twin Cities area). I have pictures of this “event” but hell if I’m posting them. I would if it had been at one of the Minnesota locations, but it’s a Joe’s in the Chicago area, so no dice.

Unlike the lovely Fridley Crab House, this dining establishment is a chain, so location usually doesn’t matter, and most of this could apply to one of the MN locations. Whether it’s Chicago or Minnesota, you’re still in a landlocked state thousands of miles from the sea, leaving few choices for authentic and fresh-off-the-liner ocean seafood. Unless you want to fork over some big bucks for a meal at Oceanaire (which, by the way, isn’t doing so hot), places like Joe’s or Red Lobster will have to do. The people in my group thought

Joe's Crab Shack had a kiddie playground. What, is this McDonalds?

Joe's Crab Shack had a kiddie playground. What, is this McDonalds?

it would be way cool to eat here based solely on the building’s semblance of a weathered seaside frathouse that takes a yearly beating during hurricane season (Well, we were college kids).   With the tiki posts, the Christmas lights strung from the deck beams, and the sheer amount of ear-numbing NOISE coming from this restaurant, it seemed like a potential hotspot for some crazy drunken shit to go down! We were all for it. (Evidently, we didn’t notice the huge outdoor KIDS play pit smack dab in front of the restaurant. Quite a perceptive group!)

I’m not crazy about seafood, but I didn’t complain — it looked like a fun place to eat. If anything, I can just grub on the popcorn shrimp and get a lil’ tipsy. Hey, it’s better than getting smashed in a depressing hotel bar.

Even though the atmosphere has that “forced-fun-designed-in-a-corporate-boardroom” feel to it, they do an okay job making you feel like you’re at the beach. The beach = throngs of people smelling like dogs & dirt from getting wet and sweating all day…which is exactly what you’d find when dining at a restaurant right next to a major amusement park. It was packed wall-to-wall in here with the same people who were at the amusement park, sporting the putrid clothes they wore all day, still damp from riding the Roaring Rapids. (same thing as Valleyfair’s Thunder Canyon).  Pretty gross — but this could be said about any restaurant located near a Six Flags. I’m sure this wasn’t the case at the Minnesota locations.

We were seated at a booth that looked like a picnic table. The utensils and napkins were stored in some sort of metal bucket. I remember looking at the menu and I couldn’t find anything I wanted to eat. Everything on the menu looked like the type of food that leaves me running for the toilet. If the seafood isn’t battered, I don’t want anything to do with it. This only escalates the digestive troubles.  With enough breading and tartar sauce dollops, the fishy taste can be kept to a minimum. (That’s what she said!) .  I ended up ordering some sort of fried seafood basket for which I paid dearly.

The dead Joe's Crab Shack

Such a festive setting

Their specialty drinks here are more like DRANKS. High calorie, complicated, recipe-required alcoholic beverages that look like a work of art. I thought I remember them having quite an extensive drink menu, but looking at the menu online, it pales in comparison to TGIF’s selection. Maybe it varies by location? I don’t normally like spending $10 on one drink, but hey, I can live a little. I’m at JOE’S for crying out load. The waiters are wearing hula skirts and doin’ The Butt (Owww! Sexy, Sexy). I think I ordered some blue drink (just because it was blue. Damn gimmick every.freakin’.time) — pretty sure it was the Shark Bite, and I was tipsy-doodle-do after a few sips. That’s not saying much on the drink strength though. I’m a lightweight and beer battered walleye would get me feelin’ loose.   When my drink arrived, everyone in my party thought it looked wicked cool, so more Shark Bites were ordered by our crew. Gotta live every week like it’s Shark Week, I guess.

Despite this seaside shanty’s appearance of a party house for drunken beach bums, it was crawling with little kids. The outdoor playground, cheeseball decorations, and a menu made up of mostly kid-friendly seafood should’ve tipped us off, but we were pretty surprised at all the little rugrats swimming around in here. Definitely not a place for a romantic dinner.

I can’t write about Joe’s Crab Shack without mentioning the singing staff. Every 15-20 minutes, all the servers here break into a silly song and dance routine that no one pays attention to, except the kids. It’s kind of cute the first time they do it, but beyond that, it just gets annoying. Sometimes, they try to guilt-trip you into joining them. The first act, they do the Macarena. Second act is the Sprinkler. Third act, they do the Hustle. Enough already, just let me eat my soggy seafood and limp french fries!!  By the way, NEVER mention that it’s your birthday. Unless you like wearing a coconut bra and dancing in the aisles to a Jimmy Buffet song…all while a pulsating strobe light illuminates the room, making you dizzy. The free scoop of vanilla ice cream just isn’t worth it.

They also had a gift shop here, kind of like what you’d find at the Hard Rock Cafe or Margaritaville, except Joe’s totally capitalizes on the “crabs” theme. Obviously. Nothing like a little STD innuendo to whet your appetite. You can buy all kinds of shit with clever puns – like shotglasses inscribed with “Peace, Love, and Crabs” or a t-shirt that reads, “Check out my mussels.” You go Joe! I surely didn’t see those jokes coming!

The abandoned Joe's Crab Shack Playland.

The abandoned Joe's Crab Shack Playland.

The food eventually came, with our server hastily dropping our grub off at our table to go do another dance. Between the Shark Bite drinks, my fried platter, and the sand pails of crab, by the end of the night, our table looked like Jaws threw up. No one complained about the food, but no one raved about it either. Or maybe they did. I don’t know — it was so damn loud up in hurrr that I don’t think anyone in our party held a conversation beyond, “WHAT?? CAN YOU REPEAT THAT?” “OH FUCK IT, TELL ME LATER.”  We left this place with our ears ringing and our bellies full of grease. Joe’s Crab Shack was one big fishy pile of MEH…but I bet my cat would love to eat the leftovers.

That said, I can’t say I’m sad that this chain uprooted itself from Minnesota. I remember one time in 2001, when my sister came into town — we had just finished up a marathon shopping session over at Rosedale and we were looking for a place to eat. She saw Joe’s and noted the boisterous vibe, but I just couldn’t bring myself to go here again. We settled on Olive Garden. Free salad and breadsticks, yo!

If I had a choice, give me Red Lobster. At least they have the cheesy biscuits. Or just give me that filet-o-fish. Give me that fish.

Any memories of Joe’s Crab Shack? Feel free to share in the comments!

Photos taken June 2009.

Eat at Joe's

Eat at Joe's

Another view of the Roseville Joe's Crab Shack

Another view of the Roseville Joe's Crab Shack

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Moon Plaza: Fridley, MN

Moon Plaza

The Moon Plaza

For those of you who don’t consider yourself “Down to Earth”, Fridley has a shopping center just for you!

Welcome to Moon Plaza, an out-of-this-world 1960’s style strip mall located off of University Avenue in Fridley, MN.  Surrounded by a bunch of crumbling, abandoned buildings, depressing Moon Plaza fits right in with the local atmosphere.

Built in 1965, the Moon Plaza looks like it’s never been updated. The sign itself looks like it’s still stuck in the decade of weed smoking, mud orgies, and free love.  Back in the ’60s, Moon Plaza was probably a pretty groovy place: Parking lot teeming with classic VW bugs and Buick Rivieras.  Go-go dancers in mod dresses getting Twiggy haircuts! Men in search of knock-off John Lennon-style eyeglasses! Worried moms stuffing two shopping carts full of supplies for the fallout shelter into the Chevelle! Mischievous teens dropping acid behind the dumpster!

Today, it’s just another University Avenue Eyesore. No longer giving off that “Hey Hey We’re the Monkees” vibe, Moon Plaza looks so melancholy and depressing that it probably cries itself to sleep every night, hoping, begging, and praying that someone, somewhere will tear it down and replace it with a Sonic and a Jimmy Johns.

The Moon Plaza ought to be sucked into a black hole

The Moon Plaza ought to be sucked into a black hole

Its name — “Moon Plaza” — likely reflects a sign of its time. Constructed during the “Space Race”, America’s obsession with rockets, planets, and starship enterprises was at an all-time high. So what better than to name your new shopping center after a faraway object from the cosmos?

Or perhaps the builder was an exhibitionist and just wanted a place for other hot-doggers to feel welcome to publicly pull down their drawers and reveal their fleshy rear ends to the world (this was the ’60s…).

It was built in ‘65, so Man would not land on the moon until 4 years later. But Man could land at Moon Plaza.

*shrugs*

Seems like a viable alternative to me.  Moon Plaza, the next best thing to being Neil Armstrong?

As far as the businesses here, there isn’t much to write home about. Every business here is of the “move-along-nothing-to-see-here” type.  Don’t expect to find a store selling moonrocks or moonboots here.

There’s a dry cleaners, an employment office, a beauty salon, the “Cozy Cafe”,  a Farmer’s Insurance office, etc.  Ho-hum.

I *think* there’s a video rental store here, so you probably could rent Star Wars or Space Jam or something. “Space Jam, come and slam! Welcome to the jam!” Speaking of Space Jam, don’t you wish they made more movies based on shoe commercials?  Anyway…

Enjoy the rest of the photos!

On the particular day I went to take pictures, we were getting a doozy of a snowstorm.

All photos taken December 2008…I originally had more photos but some were lost when my hard drive crashed. Luckily these photos were still on my digital camera’s memory card. I know they’re not the best…

A deserted gas station located near Moon Plaza. Random abandoned buildings are commonplace along Univ. Ave

A deserted gas station located near Moon Plaza. Random abandoned buildings are commonplace along Univ. Ave

Moon

Waxing or waning, any ol' time a good time to visit the Moon Plaza.

Moon Plaza

Despite its name, Moon Plaza cannot defy gravity, thus the need for columns to hold up the roof.

Tags: , , , , ,

Brookdale Macy's & Brookdale Mall, part 2

Macy's mess

This is a perfect time for me to recite my favorite Jurassic Park line: "That is one big pile of shit!"

The Brookdale Macy’s is closing and Dumpy Strip Malls is there!

I paid a final visit to Macy’s  last Friday afternoon.

It was just as I expected it to be — incredibly depressing. The store was pretty messy – it looked like a TJ Maxx at closing time. If you’re thinking of

checking it out one last time, I wouldn’t bother.

This is NOT like the other Macy’s in Minnesota, mang.

Vinyl clothing strewn everywhere. Jeans in the color scheme of a child’s fingerpainting project. Porn star formal wear. Dinnerware locked up in the jewelry cases. Anti-theft devices on bags of Whole Bean Starbucks Coffee

and boxes of Frango Mints.

Yep, it’s details like this that set the Brookdale Macy’s apart.

The prices on the merchandise weren’t anything to write home about. 30% off here, 40% off there. Meh. Give it a few weeks though and the prices will be good enough to tell Winona Ryder about this place – the clearance sale prices will likely be equal to stealing.

Most of the shit in this Macy’s I wouldn’t even take if it were free. See example below:

fds

Even Missy Elliott, queen of the Obnoxious Parka, is going, "Oh, girl, NO."

The urban designers are the heavy hitters at the Brookdale Macy’s.  If you’re trying to look like Master P, Fergie Ferg, Jenny from the Block, or that dude from the Sopranos who got whacked in the 3rd season, you’ll find a stockpile of blingity-bling-bling-blinged-out threads here.

Or, for this Halloween, if you’re thinking of going as Master P, Fergie Ferg, Jenny from the Block, or that dude from the Sopranos who got whacked in

ouch

I can't think of anything I'd rather wear than a plastic jacket that will crack after a few weeks of wear. In your choice of colors!

the 3rd season, you’ll find your supplies here. And at discount prices! Take THAT, Party City, and your ridiculously priced $70 adult costumes!

Macy’s wasn’t quite at the point of selling their in-store display cases and mannequins for cash quite yet, but they did have what looked like a raffle box set up at the front of the store where you could throw in your business card if you were interested in a headless mannequin or rolling rack.

I have a lot of memories of shopping at the Brookdale Macy’s…well, more like the Brookdale Dayton’s. I can’t say I ever really shopped here since it’s been a Macy’s or even Marshall Fields. My parents bought our Disneyworld vacation from Dayton’s travel. I got my first pair of jeans here when I was in elementary school – a pair of light blue stonewashed (but of course!) Levi jeans and I wore them on the first day of 2nd grade.  Most of my back-to-school clothes came from here. I remember when I finally got old enough to shop in the Juniors department instead of the girls’ section. I was so excited!  When Dayton’s decided to get rid of their electronic department, we  got some cheap Nintendo games & accessories, including the Power Glove and the Power Pad. It came with Track & Field, and my mom also bought us Dance Aerobics, which was an incredible

disappointment. Even though the Power Pad was like a prehistoric WII Fit, it never quite took off. Ahhh…so ahead of its time.

Probably my favorite memory of the Brookdale Macy’s was when my brother and I would play hide & seek inside the clothing racks when Mom would drag us clothes shopping. When she’d go in the dressing room to try on clothes, we’d hide out in the nearest rack to the fitting room door, and when she got out, we’d pop out and scare the shit out of her.  Worked EVERY time. One time, we knocked over an entire rack of corduroy pants. After that, we had the choice of a week of no Nintendo or wearing one of those kid dog leashes every time we went shopping.  She wasn’t kidding either – she had one for our little sister. It even reeled the kid in, like when fishing. *Zzzzzzzzzip!*

We went with the Nintendo option – even though taking away our gaming system hit us where it hurt, the public humiliation of being on a child

This is the Misses department. I did not know that Apple Bottom made "Mom Jeans" but I guess they do

She had dem Apple Bottom Jean (jeans)...

...Boots with the Fur. The whole club waz lookin' at herrr

...Boots with the Fur. The whole club waz lookin' at herrr

safety harness was much, much worse.

We stopped hiding in the racks after corduroy pants capsizing incident. We took up another

hobby instead: Whining. Because, as we learned, you can’t effectively whine at Mom to buy you toys if you’re hiding out in racks.

I haven’t shopped here in over 10 years, so I won’t miss Macy’s Brookdale as a shopping destination, but I will miss knowing that it’s there. Errr…that might sound strange. I guess I figure that if Macy’s can stay at Brookdale, then there’s some hope that the mall I grew up with as a child can stick around, and perhaps make a turnaround. But with Macy’s closing, it’s pretty much a death-blow to Brookdale.

Sure, I’ll poke fun at Brookdale, but do I really want a wrecking crew to bulldoze the place? No. I want someone to come save it. Will that happen? Highly unlikely, especially in this shit economy.

asdasdasdas

Reeboks with the Straps? The Brookdale Macy's is a triple threat for "getting low"! And check out those Laura Ingalls Wildler loafers in the foreground. My grandma would love those!

After visiting Macy’s, I decided to check out Brookdale again to see what’s changed. I last visited the Brookdale Mall in August 2008 – here’s my original post. In the short few months since I had last been there, there’s been some changes…

  • Steve & Barry’s closed
  • Macy’s is closing
  • Victoria’s Secret is closed
  • Pacific Sunwear is closed. I think Hot Topic is gone now too
  • One of the jewelry stores closed.
  • A slew of other stores closed & I can’t remember what they were

To my surprise, the mall was fairly busy (relatively speaking, of course) for a late afternoon on a Friday. I didn’t get harassed or threatened, but honestly, I did feel a bit unsafe. There were quite a few folks strolling through the mall who looked like they belonged on a police lineup . Lots of loitering teens “holla-ing” at each other.

I did witness a few interesting things though…

I overhead a little boy, probably not older than 6,  singing “Love Lockdown.” I suppose it could’ve been worse. He could’ve been singing “One More Drink” by Ludacris.

I saw a group of teens (a few with red bandannas tied around their ankles)

I kept expecting zombies to pop out of nowhere.

I kept expecting zombies to pop out of nowhere.

talking to a friendly law enforcement official. Yeah, a real cop, not Paul Blart.

A mom with about a half dozen elementary school aged children in tow, loudly dropping f-bomb a dozen times after finding out that Victora’s Secret was closed.

Two elderly ladies talking about how this mall has gone to pit. Awww. I should’ve told them to come visit my blog. Then again, they might not enjoy it, with the harsh language, stupid jokes, and lame pop culture references and all…

I spent about 15 minutes total strolling through Brookdale, which was more than enough time that I wanted to spend there. I probably won’t be back until I see the wrecking ball and bulldozer in the parking lot.

Well, I’m going to have to cut this entry short. I have to get back to writing my “25 random things about me” note on Facebook. I need to let friends, coworkers, former coworkers, high school classmates I haven’t talked to in at least 10 years, and the dude who works at my neighborhood BP station, and other random acquantices know that I have double-jointed thumbs, I still listen to the Backstreet Boys (their comeback material is shit, but I love the stuff from the “Backstreet’s Back ALRIGHT” days),  and my favorite cereal is Special K Chocolately Delight.

Enjoy the rest of the photos! (All photos taken Jan. 2009)

Check out the ORIGINAL Brookdale Mall post for more pictures and information about this mall.

MACYS:

These orange & black Coach shoes really aren't THAT bad, by themselves
Too much orange and black in this pic. Reminds me of those orange & black wrapped peanut butter taffy horseshit candy that’s given out by all the neighborhood grumps on Halloween
Wow. NEON BLUE jeans. Flashback to 2001, no? You know, I bet Tara Reid would still wear these, paired with a baby-t

Wow. NEON BLUE jeans with fading. Flashback to 2001, no? You know, I bet Tara Reid would still wear these, paired with a baby-t

654654

20 years ago, I got a Swatch Watch at this counter. :(

You know you're at the Brookdale Macy's when... Corelle dinnerware is locked up in a fine jewelry case

You know you're at the Brookdale Macy's when... Corelle dinnerware is locked up in the fine jewelry case

asdasdas

40% off??! And an extra 10% off if I use my Macy's card? Don't try to hard-sell me, bitch. :P

asdasda

First thought: "Luggage! Aha, something NORMAL." Second thought: "It's fire engine RED. Yuck." Why does everything here have to be in some obnoxious color??

This is where the Juniors department once was. Now it holds clothing for Baby Thug
Maybe if Macy’s invested in a Bissel, they wouldn’t be going out of business.
Rugs
60% off area rugs – I guess that’s not that bad of a deal. Those things are $$$$$!
asdasd

30% off? Fuck that - I've got a friend in the diamond business. I'm sure he'll hooks me up.


BROOKDALE MALL:

Macy's

Macy's is singing its swansong

ewerwer

Auntie Annie's Pretzels is closed.

asdasda
Big Harry Deals- a dollar store with an “urban” touch
sdfsdf
You know, would it be so bad if they tore down this mall and put in an In-N-Out burger? Mmm. Why can’t we have one in Minnesota??? So good.
fsdfsfsd
Another view of Brookdale
adasdas
Photo Gifts. Yep, just what I want. A grainy silk-screened picture of Grandma on 50/50 cotton poly blend.
This is where Stuarts, B. Dalton, and Maurices once were

This is where Stuarts, B. Dalton, and Maurices once were

asdasd

The one good claim Brookdale can make is its "unique" selection of stores. Everything else seems to be Wal-Marted & Starbucked to death.

I love going to Brookdale for the huge selection of stores

I love Brookdale's huge selection of stores!

don't bring anyone here on a date if you ever want to see them again

Yay, the Brookdale Food Court. Don't bring anyone here on a date if you ever want to see them again

asdasdasdas
I can haz government bailout?
asdasd

Will anyone save the Brookdale Mall in its 11th hour?

"Come See the Softer Side of Sears." Sears MUST have a soft side. For Brookdale, that is. How they've stayed in business is an enigma

"Come See the Softer Side of Sears." Sears MUST have a soft side. For Brookdale, that is. Sears probably stays at Brookdale out of pity.

Lots of Minnesotans think that Brookdale should be razed and a Vikings stadium

Lots of Minnesotans think that Brookdale should be razed and a Vikings stadium should be built in its place. 'Cuz you know, the Vikes will move if we don't get a new stadium soon and without the Vikings, Minnesota will just be a Cold Omaha.

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The final blow to Brookdale?

It was only a matter of time. According to the StarTribune this morning, the Brookdale Macy’s store will close. No date was announced, but a final clearance sale will begin next week.  Great time to stock up on Apple Bottom jeans and boots with the fur.

Like many Minnesotans, I loathe Macy’s, and I’m shocked at how long this store has lasted at Brookdale, but I honestly feel a little sad about this. We did so much of our “back to school” shopping back when it was Daytons.  I can thank the Brookdale Daytons for my reputation as a teenage fashion plate! I would spend HOURS in the Dayton’s juniors department, trying to put together an outfit that make me look like a dazzling recreation of Six from Blossom.

Most of my teenage wardrobe came from the Brookdale Macy’s. Esprit sweatshirts! Esprit book bags! Girbaud jeans! Champion sweatshirts (along with the required white turtleneck to wear underneath)! Calvin Klein “Ck” t-shirts! Long, shapeless button-front floral dresses!

These days, there’s pretty much nothing I’d want to buy at the Brookdale Macy’s. It’s run down, it’s dirty, and it seems to cater to the taste of a hooker. Back in the day, the only “ghetto” clothing the Brookdale Macy’s sold was Cross Colours and those t-shirts with thugged out Looney Tunes characters on them.

I remember going there as recently as 2004, and even though the ghetto fab clothing was slowing creeping in, this Macy’s carried decent brands that I would buy, such as Free People and Lucky. Not anymore! It’s all Sean John, Ecko, and G-Unit clothing these days.

Now, all that’s left are Sears and Barnes & Noble to hold down the fort. No crystal ball needed to predict the future here; Brookdale isn’t going to last much longer. Bring in the wrecking crew…

I’ll try to stop in the store later this week to snap some photos, since I didn’t do that in my Brookdale Mall post.

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Village North Shopping Center: Brooklyn Park, MN

People give me  “street cred” when I mention that I grew up in Brooklyn Park. Those of you who also grew up in the BP area probably find that statement as ridiculous as I do.  Because if ice skating at the Evergreen Park rink and drying off in the warming house, taking swimming lessons at the Community Center, walking to Tom Thumb, and eating at Bok Ho gives you street cred, then by all means, call me a gangbanger. Ay yo trip! You know what I’m sayin’? Fo’ SHIZ, homeslice!

I insist to people that it was a nice area in which to grow up, but not everyone these days believes me. Rightfully so. The area has gone to pit.

But in the ’80s, it was nice. Even in the Zane Avenue area. Village North, you haven’t been forgotten!

Village North wasn’t just any old strip mall. Architecturally, it looked like a strip mall, with the shops arranged in a linear fashion, but it functioned more like a regular mall.  It was always busy, you could walk the interior of the mall, they held events like craft shows, and by golly, even Santa paid his yearly visit.

Tear it down; Build Condos!!!!

Yep, these ugly townhomes replaced Village North. This particular building style can be found in just about every suburb of Minneapolis. Someone stop Ryland Homes before they take over the metro.

I joke about tearing places down and building condos, but really, that’s exactly what happened to poor Village North. They tore it down sometime in 2003, and by 2006ish, up went a bunch of cookie cutter condos/townhomes. I really don’t know how bad the crime got in the mall – I last visited it in 1998, and it seemed safe enough then.

I apologize for the lack of OLD pictures. It’s not like I didn’t try! With the exception of the Circus Circus pics, all I have are current pictures of what the area looks like today.

You’d never know a landmark strip mall once stood here.

Now it looks like they’re trying to turn Zane Avenue/Brooklyn Blvd into another Plymouth, manufactured city center and all.

The Stores:

I listed these by location – from one end of the mall to the other. This is entirely based on memory, and I could be wrong. Please let me know if you have corrections or additions by emailing me or posting in the comments.

Korner Plaza: Closed in 1987. It was some sort of department store. I believe they sold juniors clothing, toys, and inflatable rafts.  Rafts? Yeah, random, I know. But my mom bought my brother and I each an inflatable raft to use up at the cabin. So they sold outdoor sporting goods too. Go figure.

Minnesota Fabrics: Korner Plaza became Minnesota Fabrics at some point.

Some big pet food store. Not sure if it was a Petco or what…? I can’t remember if  the pet store took over the spot of Minnesota Fabrics when it closed or if they coexisted next door to each other in blissful harmony.

Circus Circus: For us ’80s kids, this was the main draw of Village North. No, it was nothing like its Vegas namesake – this was not a fleabag motel & gambling establishment – it was a kid-friendly arcade. It was just like a Showbiz Pizza or a Chuck E Cheese — greasy pizza, a band of singing mechanical beasts featuring one hella scary gorilla, arcade games, skeeball, bumper cars, tickets redeemable for shit prizes, and the signature dark, dreary decor that gave this place a sinister feeling.

This Circus Circus location had a big ball crawl right near the entrance.  As adults, we all know it’s a bacteria farm. Unless they hired a Hazmat crew to come in to fumigate and sterilize every hour, if you went into the ball crawl, there was a pretty good chance you were going to come out with a rash and a case of the whopping cough. But at least Walgreens was right down the hallway, so you could pick up some Robitussin before heading home :)

Circus Circus, 1988

My family at Circus Circus, April 1988

Sometime in the ’80s, Circus Circus remodeled and expanded. I’m not sure when this was, but it had to have been prior to 1988, as the photos below show the new & expanded dining area. The old dining area turned into some sort of sports bar with a bunch of TVs. It was separated from the main dining area by a glass wall (smoking was allowed in this area). You rarely saw families eating in this area; only really, really creepy old men hung out here, drinking beer and and chain smoking.  The guys in here creeped me out – if they want to drink beer and watch the Vikings, why not go to a bar? For pete’s sake, Blondies is right down the road. Yeah…that’s because today, these same men are probably on Dateline’s Chris Hansen’s shit list. I believe they kept the animatronic show in the old eating area, at least for a while.

The new eating area was much larger than the old digs – and had a 3-ring circus style Rockafire Explosion show! (The old stage only allowed the main band). The animatronic show would just start out of nowhere, scaring the crap out of everyone. Being serenaded by a rat cheerleader, a possum in a trash can, and a scary ass gorilla lip syncing Beach Boys songs while eating greasy pizza was every kid’s dream.

They also installed this glass box that looked like a telephone booth inside the eating area. It was used for birthday parties – the birthday boy or girl would go into the box, the Circus Circus mascot (a scary clown with a huge head) started up a fan and a bunch of tickets would fly around in the box. Your job was to catch as many as you could before the time ran out. All kids were envious of whoever the birthday kid was, regardless if you knew him or not. Because WE WANTED TICKETS. They were our passports to treasure, redeemable for a giant Styrofoam pellet teddy bear, a terrycloth wristband, or a plastic yo-yo!

Elegant dining at Circus Circus

Elegant family dining at Circus Circus. I'm missing from this picture - I was probably off getting a disease in the ballcrawl. My dad is missing too, but he's probably the one snapping the photo - April 1988

When you ordered food at the counter, you were given a number and instructed to watch the monitors for your order to be ready. While we waited for our pizza, Mom and Dad set us loose in the arcade to play games, but instructed us to watch the monitor for our number. And this was how my parents discovered I needed glasses. I kept playing skeeball long after our number came up. Mom thought I was being difficult; truth was, I couldn’t read the monitor. I wasn’t a happy camper! I thought glasses were fug. I only needed them for distance, I didn’t need to wear them full-time. Thank goodness too, because – LIKE, WHAT ABOUT FASHION?!

Great American Music. It had a wood store front. All I can remember is that it sold records and cassettes and was located right by Circus Circus. My mom bought Michael Jackson’s Thriller tape here!

Mario’s Movies & Games: Mario dealt in new and used movies and Nintendo/Sega games. So if you wanted, you could sell your 8-Bit NES and games to Mario (but don’t get your hopes up too high if the only game you had was Super Mario Bros/Duck Hunt. You’d be lucky if he’d give you a quarter for it). Too bad eBay wasn’t around in those days. I don’t know if the place was actually owned by a guy named Mario. Probably not. Chances are, he wanted to capitalize on the Nintendo trend and use the namesake of the chubby video game plumber to lure in the hardcore gamer demographic (a.k.a. impressionable 10 year olds). After all, how many MARIOS do you know?

Famous Footwear: Not much to say about this. Though the Village North location is obviously gone, the Famous Footwears of today still look pretty much the same way they did in the ’80s.

Brauns: I HATED THIS PLACE and I imagine if you grew up in this area in the ’80s, you hated it too. It’s where Mom shopped and where kids whined and fussed. Brauns made Mom look like a mom. They sold Mom Jeans, Mom Shirts, Mom Slacks, Mom Vests, and other various Mom Accessories. Hi Mom! :)

Simeks Meat & Seafood:  I LOVED their samples! They always had a plate of meatballs near the enterance, so while Mom finished checking out at Walgreens, my brother and I would wander over to Simecks to feast on some meat.  The cashier would give us the evil eye and alert her manager to boot us out of the store if we were sneaking too many meatballs. They also sold some really good RAW cookie dough too.

Radio Shack: If Village North still existed in 2009, this Radio Shack location would still be in business. This chain should’ve died sometime in the VCR age, but nope. It’s apparently harder to kill than a  cockroach. I guess there’s still enough demand out there for phone jacks, DC 12V car adapters, and metal dectectors to support this place.

Walgreens today. I believe it moved to this location in 1998

Walgreens today. I believe it moved to this location in 1998

Walgreens: This was one of the busiest stores in Village North. Our doctor’s office was around the Village North area, so this is where we got all of our prescriptions filled when we were sick.  Today, Walgreens is located about a block down the road, in its own stand-alone building.

Sabo Flowers

Some dry cleaning place

Hallmark

A barber shop: Even had one of those rotating barber poles!

A pet store: I’m not sure if they actually sold pets other than fish and birds, because I only remember getting flakey fish food and tank equipment at this store. I can’t remember its name. They had a great selection of pretty colored fish tank rocks too.

Plaster Paradise:  Plaster Paradise was definitely different. They sold exactly what you think they’d sell – plaster. Yep, plain plaster sculptures, all ready to be colored in whatever lead-based paint hues you wish. Painting these spackle statues didn’t require a whole lot of artistic ability.  Sure, you could REALLY go all out with these plastered widgets, but for the most part, anyone could make these suckers look halfway decent, even my 8 year old brother who liked to destroy my Barbie coloring books by scribbling all over the pages using Crayola’s Raw Umber and only Raw Umber.

This craft was kind of like Ukrainian Egg Art for the less talented. They had a huge selection of various spackle statues – you could paint your own knock-off Precious Moments doll or Hummel statuette. Besides the statuettes, they sold pretty much every other dust-collecting home decor item you could imagine – doorknockers, bookends, wall hangings, napkin rings, Christmas ornaments, weapons of mass destruction… All with a completely blank slate for the do-it-yourself hobbyist. They sold all kinds of painting supplies here too – different sized paint brushes and every color of paint you could imagine.  Most importantly, it was MISSION CRITICAL not to leave this store without an aerosol can of shellack. Your precious artwork was not complete until you doused it with a coating of glaze, giving your brainchild a shiny varnish, ready for household display.

Company’s Coming: They sold everything you needed to throw a kick ass party, without the liquor. Company’s Coming was a “mom and pop” version of a Party City. It was a very tiny store, which really is the ideal size of a party store. I don’t get why places like Party City occupy a building as large as a Wal Mart. A party store need not to be that damn big!

Ben Franklin: I wrote about this place in my 10 Stores I Wish Were Still in Business post – basically, it’s a scaled-down version of a Michael’s. I went here to stock up on  embroidery thread for my BFF Friendship Bracelet business.

Northwest Book Store: A Christian book store that sold bibles, Billy Graham posters, Precious Moments trash, and Sister Theresa bookmarks. I didn’t like this place because they didn’t sell Babysitters Club or Sweet Valley High books. Probably because a Christan book store would think  Jessica Wakefield ranked right up there with Judas.

IGN Super Valu: I wasn’t a fan of Super Valu. Or its red-headed stepchild, Red Owl (located across the street). This grocer had two good things going for it: #1: The chicken clucking machine at the front of the store, where you’d put in a quarter, the chicken would cluck to the beat of a nursery rhyme, and when the song would finish, you’d get a plastic egg with a surprise inside…which was usually incredibly disappointing. I once got a “gold” smiley face ring that broke me out in a nasty rash.

#2: They had baggers who would sack up your groceries for you, place them in a plastic numbered bin, and put them on a rolling belt at the front of the store. You’d go out to your car, pull up to the curb, and the friendly stock boy would place your bags into your car. How nice.

Burger Bros: Took over the grocery store location.  Burger Brothers was a locally-owned company that was acquired by Gander Mountain in 1995. They sold sporting goods and had a giant bear in the store. Burger Brothers closed in 1997.

Around Village North:

The area around Village North was quite memorable too, so it’s worth covering.

In the parking lot area:

Arby’s: Arby’s was located in the Village North parking lot. It probably faced a lot of competition from the Rax across the street. In the end, Arby’s won the Roast Beef War and stayed in business long after Rax shut its doors.

An ATM: There was an ATM in the middle of the Village North parking lot. I don’t know why I remember this, but for some reason, whenever I picture the Village North shopping center, I always remember that ATM.

Marquette Bank: This was a circular shaped building with glass windows all around it in the Village North parking lot.

AMF Village North Bowl: Even back in the ’80s, my parents wouldn’t take us to this particular bowling alley. They thought it was really seedy. And it was – I think I only went there once as a child, for a birthday party. As an adult, I went there once in 2003, and got my drink on. Enough so that I sang at the karaoke bar and cleared out the place in 7 seconds flat. I sure liked their wireless microphone… The bowling alley was in the “back” area of Village North. I think it MIGHT have been connected to the mall, but I’m not sure. This was demolished in 2005. To fill the void, Brunswick Lanes opened up sometime in 2006. Call ahead to get your name on the lane list and don’t forget your glock!

McDonalds: This was a nasty, noxious McDonalds, even back in the ’80s. It was a franchised owned, not a company-owned restaurant, so they did things their way, and it showed. They served seasonal items like an orange milkshake months after the other Mickey Dees ceased sales. They never got your order right, most of the time the cold fries were knocked upside down and spilled all over the bottom of the bag, their hotcakes tasted & looked like glow-in-the-dark frisbees, and when you bit into their chicken nuggets, you often spotted a pink, cordlike tail.

Other places around the area:

Heaven help us, it's still here...

Heaven help us, it's still here...

Godfather’s Pizza: I can’t believe this dump is still around. The proof is in the photos!

There was also some sort of cowboy/hee-haw/Cattle Company style restaurant located in the Godfather’s Pizza/Century Court apartments/Blondies vicinity. You couldn’t see it from the main drag, and I can’t remember the name. It didn’t last long, and we only ate there once. All I remember is that ties were not allowed, and if you wore one, they make you take it off and replace it with one of those cowboy Randy Travis-style bolo ties — you know, with the ugly sheriff’s star pendant and a leather rope looped through it.

Century Court/Huntington Pointe Apartments: Brooklyn Park’s version of Cabrini Green. Was notoriously known as the ‘Most Dangerous Place in Brooklyn Park” by my

Huntington Pointe

Brooklyn Park needs more slum lord apartments, not fucking PARKS. :P

circle of friends. You did NOT go here at night! Century Courts was owned by Harv and Marv – 2 notorious slumlords. It was renamed  “Huntington Pointe” in the late ’90s to improve its image. The entire complex was razed in April 2008 and in its place is a park. Like Brooklyn Park NEEDS more parks…. ;)

Blondie’s: This bar is trouble – recent murder scene. Nice.

Across the Boulevard:

Ponderosa Steak House: If you’re not familiar with Ponderosa Steak House, please, for the love of god, don’t let the name fool you. Technically, yes, it’s a steak house, but if you’re expecting Ruth Chris’, Murray’s, or even Timberlodge, you will be quite disappointed. Ponderosa tried to pass itself off as a chophouse, but really it was a toned-down version of the Old Country Buffet.  When a “chophouse” offers a smograsboard (with a taco bar) AND a western-style atmosphere, you’re not going to get a prime cut of meat. You couldn’t pop bottles here (no liquor licence), but you could pop buttons – since you could order a steak AND graze the buffet, you buckaroos could really get your gorge on.

Rax:  It was a fast food roast beef chain, similar to Arby’s. This location used to be a Country Kitchen. We didn’t go here very often, because my mom hated this place. I don’t remember much about it except that they had good shakes, the building looked like a solarium with all the windows, and had wicked cool alligator shaped plastic bottles for the drinks. (Don’t get too excited, Rax didn’t have a liquor license either. Can you imagine what fun drinking a cap’n coke would be in an Uncle Alligator bottle? Blondie’s has the liquor license & it’s across the street, but they sure as hell don’t serve moonshine in an alligator glass. If you asked for something like that, you’d probably get a cap in your ass.

Burger King, photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park

Burger King, photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park

Burger King: Closed in 2004. Demolished in 2006. According to the city of BP, there’s supposed to be a medical building up in its place.

Koops Red Owl: Yuck. Didn’t like grocery shopping here either. It reminded me of a small town grocer, especially with the hanging vinyl strips in the freezer sections, that you had to dip in and out of to get your foodstuff. It was a tiny grocery store and we only went here when we were waiting for our pizza to be ready at the nearby Little Ceasers. The fresh produce section was a mess – you really had to watch your step since half of the produce was smeared all over the floor. The fruit looked too nasty to buy, anyway – wormholed apples, peaches so bruised that it looked like they got in a bar fight, and bananas so spotty it looked like they had a case of the herp. Koops is now a Family Dollar.

Little Ceasers, Clean N Press For Less, Cost Cutters: These were all located in a small strip mall near Koops. The strip mall is still standing but the standard Brooklyn Park lineup of a check cashing place and an employment office prevails. I got my first perm at this Cost Cutters when I was in 3rd grade. I was going to write about how crazy my mom was for letting me get chemically-enhanced hair at that age, but these days, 9 year olds are getting botox, so I guess a perm is pretty tame.

Rocky Roccoo

Mr. Roccoo is still here!

Rocky Rococo: And it’s still here! Rocky himself looks more Panama Jack than Italian Pizza Connoisseur but hey, whatever works. They have great pizza! For Valentine’s day, pick your lover up a heart-shaped pizza pie and prepared to get laid. Hubba, hubba!

Goodyear Tires: Still around today!

Denny’s: Yep, Brooklyn Park once had its own Denny’s, a soulless, homogenized version of a greasy spoon-type diner. The only time it’s okay to go to a Denny’s is if it’s 3AM and you’re trying to sober up by eating a chicken fried steak after a night of painting the town red. I didn’t eat at this Denny’s much, maybe a handful of times. When it comes to the 24-hour diner type places,  I always preferred Perkins to Denny’s any day of the week. Two words: WISHING WELL. When I eat greasy diner food, I’m going to shit it all out anyway, so by god, I at least want a cereal-box quality souvenir to commemorate the event.

Dunkin’ Donuts: They served donuts when donuts weren’t kool, krispy, or kremey. There were no community service officers directing traffic in and around this place. No reporters from WCCO. No people pitching tents and camping out for a fucking bear claw. Just donuts, no drama. Donuts didn’t become “cool” in Minnesota until the Krispy Kreme in Maple Grove opened in 2001. I’m guessing this place was closed by 2001 but I’m not entirely sure. I know it was open in 1998, but that’s the last I remember it.

Budget Power: I believe there was a Budget Power in this area, across from Village North. Budget Power was a local hardware chain. I don’t think we ever shopped there. All I remember is that the logo had a lightening bolt.

More places

Rapid Oil Change: Rapid Oil Change turned into some car audio equipment store sometime in the late ’90s. Now it’s some place that’s part barbershop, part spinning rims dealer. Not surprising in the least.

The former Rapid Oil Change location

The former Rapid Oil Change location

White Castle and Dairy Queen: Yep, both are still standing to this day!

Seedy Strip Mall off of Brookdale Drive: I can’t recall ANY time we EVER stopped here because even back in the day, this place was a little shady. They had (and still have) a Chinese restaurant here. I’m not sure if it’s the same one or not.

Moonraker Apartments: (At least I think they were the Moonraker Apartments. Please correct me if I am wrong). They always had that sign that said, “If you lived here, you’d be home by now.” These apartments were shit even back in the ’80s.

Please enjoy the rest of the photos – all photos (except where noted) taken December 2008.

Feel free to share your memories of Village North Shopping Center in the comments!

dasdsa

The backend of what was Village North

Another view down the Boulevard

Another view down the Boulevard

Another view of the Godfather's Pizza

Another view of the Godfather's Pizza. It's empty, yet open for business

Woo hoo! Dairy Queen's still around

Woo hoo! Dairy Queen's still around

Brunswick Bowl - come for the lanes, stay for the knife fights

Brunswick Zone - come for the lanes, stay for the knife fights

Koops is now a Family Dollar...and it's probably just as nasty inside as it used to be

Koops is now a Family Dollar...and it's probably just as nasty inside as it used to be

This was the strip mall right by Koops. There used to be a Little Ceasers, Great Clips, and Clean N Press for Less here

This was the strip mall right by Koops. There used to be a Little Ceasers, Great Clips, and Clean N Press for Less here

A sign for the seedy strip mall off of Brookdale Drive & Zane (right across from the Dairy Queen...and MORE slummy apartments)

A sign for the seedy strip mall off of Brookdale Drive & Zane (right across from the Dairy Queen...and MORE slummy apartments)

Century Court Apartments, pre demolition *Photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park*

Century Court Apartments, pre demolition *Photo courtesy of the City of Brooklyn Park*

Moonraker Apartments

Moonraker Apartments

Rocky Rococo sign

Rocky Rococo sign

Another view of the townhomes

Another view of the townhomes

It's no surprise that White Castle survived!

It's no surprise that White Castle survived

Godfathers Pizza sign

Godfathers Pizza sign

With Blondie's reputation, showing the UFC fight might not be a good idea. Recipe for trouble?

With Blondie's reputation, showing the UFC fight might not be a good idea. Recipe for trouble?

Another view of Blondie's

Another view of Blondie's

Yates & Brookdale Drive. More icky apartments tarnish the BP skyline

Yates & Brookdale Drive. More icky apartments tarnish the BP skyline

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

The AxMan Surplus Store: Fridley, MN

Much fun awaits inside the Ax-Man Surplus store

Bob for treasure inside the Ax-Man Surplus store

If you’re the kind of person who’s ever wanted a metal detector for Christmas, this is the store for you. AxMan is just all kinds of awesome. So awesome that it deserves its own entry. If you’re not familiar with the Ax-Man, it’s the brick ‘n mortar version of RANDOM.  It’s the perfect place to complete your Halloween costume,  get stuff for your kid’s elementary school science fair diorama, replace a bulb on a string of Christmas lights, AND has everything you need to start your own home meth lab. ALL UNDER ONE ROOF! How many stores can attest to THAT?

There are 3 locations in the Twin Cities (St. Louis Park, St. Paul, and Fridley).

Correction/update: 12.17.08 – A helpful reader informed me that there is a new AxMax location in Crystal.

Dumpy Strip Malls visited the Fridley store. The Fridley store is located in Moore Lake Commons, a pretty boring strip mall, if it weren’t for the Ax-Man. Well…there’s a Fantasy Gifts here too (think SexWorld for the Suburbs). Oh, and there’s a Subway.

5 dollar. 5 dollar. 5 dollar footlongs.

So I guess Moore Lake Commons is not all that boring.

Heh. Anyway…

So, by now you get the idea that the AxMan isn’t a dollar store and it isn’t a thrift store. It’s a surplus store – they sell

Traffic

Perfect gift for the kid who loves playing in traffic!

shit no one else will. Their inventory changes almost every day, so there’s always new gems to find. If a business had a fire sale, AxMan’s the kind of place that would buy all of the leftover shit no one wanted. Sure, it might be a little cluttered and messy in here, but unlike the thrift store, AxMan is a HAPPY place. Their employees have a sense of humor and write funny little descriptions on the placecards near each product.  Thrift stores, on the other hand, are are downright depressing. The Goodwill always smells like mothballs and the second-hand merchandise is strewn about the store. Dirty, discarded playthings, pilly sweaters, Happy Meal action figures from 1994, endless copies of “The Superbowl Shuffle” on cassette, moth-mauled scarves, and so on. And their pricing is ridiculous! Last time I was there, they were trying to sell a plain T-shirt from The Gap for $6.99! Fuck, who are they trying to kid? I can go to Rosedale and buy a brand new one cheaper. It’s a complete buzzkill. The most depressing part of going to a thrift store is checking out the clothes and finding a label inside a sweater with a “Made with Care from Grandma” tag. Poor Grandma. If only she knew that the sweater she made with LOVE and CARE would end up thrown in a thrift store
donation bag a few years later.

Oh. Right. Ax-Man Surplus store. I’m right on it!

The Ax-Man’s a triple threat: You’ll laugh (at the funny signs), you’ll cry (after seeing naked doll butts), and you’re going to find shit to buy that you just don’t need. But that’s okay! It’s the Ax-Man — it’s cheap enough that you don’t feel bad about it. No buyers remorse here! So if your husband tells you he’s going to the Ax-Man, don’t fret. He won’t blow your life savings like he might at Home Depot. Hell, go with him! Seriously. Cuz you’ll find something you’ll like there, too.

EVERYONE can find something at the Ax-Man. I do mean EVERYONE.
Wires for Darryl, the DIY fixit dude.
Rubber rats for Perry the Prankster.
Colored pencils for Ariel the Artist.
Playboy bunny logo party cups for Todd the Tomcat.
Engine parts for George the Gear Head.
Yellow felt for Sally the Seamstress.
Grow lights for Persephone the Pot Farmer.

Beakers for Bill Nye, the science guy.
and plastic beads for Tom Shane.

AxMan

Ah HA! So this is the little fucker I saw hiding in the bushes last night! I'm warning you, if it happens again, I am calling the cops!

I challenge you to walk out of this store empty-handed! It just won’t happen. Their sociopath mascot won’t let it.

The AxMan has a murderous minion of a mascot. This wee little man looks like mini-me, but instead of wearing dapper gray suit & tie, he’s decked out in a ski mask and casually carries around an axe.

Sure, he might have a friendly smirk on that face, but we know better.  Behind that passive-aggressive smile is a little demonboy. Leave here empty-handed and he might pull a “Jack Nicholson in The Shining” and do a 1-8-7 on yer ass. Remember – this cute munchkin is carrying a fucking axe, people. Be careful.

Yep, our little AxMan makes the Candyman look like a pussy.

Anyway, I have no idea what half this stuff here is for – lots of aisles with wires, metal wheels, latex tubing, plastic discs, and other various industrial do-dads.  It looks like leftover toxic waste from 3-Mile Island. They have an aisle devoted to craft items like googley-eyes and rubber stamps and another section with a bunch of plastic toys kids will choke on. Another row had plastic syringes, medical tape, and enough beakers to make a witch doctor blush. I saw an entire section with all different kinds of lightbulbs – Christmas lights, black lights, strobe lights, etc. There IS a way to bring the disco home!

Most of this stuff in here could be fed to a junkyard dog, yet I find it completely amazing. How I’ve lived for so long without most of this stuff is beyond me.

Everything in this place is just so random and senseless. A rat window decal. Plastic VHS cases. Abe Lincoln gift bags. A toothbrush that gives a shout out to the Mesozoic era. Backpacks with the phrase “Arby’s 5-for-5″ embroidered on the pouch. Jars of colorful marbles. Pencil eraser heads. Pure mayhem, I tell you.

This store is truly a treasure, and if you have a little time to spare, I highly recommend paying a visit.

Go ahead and treat yourself to something nice!

I don't know what the hell this stuff is for. Looks like
This stuff would be a great snack for my friend’s pet bunny, whose main diet consists of printer insides, ipod headphone cords, and telephone wire
Abe Lincoln gift bag

Check this out - nothing says "Happy Birthday" like a drug company promotional swag bag with Abe Lincoln plastered on the front.

This is what happens to the dolls who get voted off the Island of Misfit toys

This is what happens to the dolls who get voted off the Island of Misfit toys

If that Caveman show on ABC wouldn't have been cancelled, I don't think these guys would be at the AxMan for 95 cents

If that Caveman show on ABC wouldn't have been canceled, I don't think these guys would be in an AxMan bin for 95 cents

These rat window decals are downright frightening!

A rat decal on your car window will make even a Dodge Neon look fucking HARD CORE.

Flooz

Guys! Here's a piece of advice: Drape yourself in this gorg fabric, hit the clubs, get piss ass drunk, and holla at some ladies. You WILL get laid.

Tape

You could really punk someone with this stuff. Why should Ashton Kutcher have all the fun?

Halloween was 2 months ago, but that doesn't stop the AxMan from peddling pumpkin pencils

Halloween was 2 months ago, but that doesn't stop the AxMan from peddling pumpkin pencils and Frankenstein gift bag.

Wooden Snakes

Okay, I could make a Snakes on a Plane joke, but I just don't have the energy.

This floozy

Secretly, everyone wants to be Conan the Barbarian, hiking in the wilderness, and cooking wild animals. This floozy looks like she's living the dream, wearing an outdoorsy ensemble with the swank panache only an outfit from Ax-Man can provide.

THIS is why you go to AxMan - a gallopping merry-go-round horse hanging from the ceiling

THIS is why you go to AxMan - where else can you see a gallopping merry-go-round horse hanging from the ceiling?

Dinosaur toothbrush

Hmm...A dinosaur toothbrush? Makes sense. T-Rex had to have some pretty strong & healthy teeth to gnaw on a straight diet of Stegosauruses and Triceratops.

Dictator hats, anyone?

Hitler hats, anyone? Dick Enrico could've used these for his commercials to add a touch of authenticity.

All photos taken December 2008.

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Rosedale Commons: Roseville, MN

Rosedale Commons

The garland around the Rosedale Commons sign is nice and all, but I'd prefer something a little more over-the-top/Clark Griswald-style myself.

On the surface, this place looks like every other strip mall out there. And it pretty much is, except for one thing. The “windows” function like garage-doors and open up in the summer, giving this place an open-air/lifestyle center-type feeling. Being that it opened in 1986, it was so ahead of its time…

Located right across the street from Rosedale Mall (the Twin Cities’ busiest mall, other than the Mall of America), Rosedale Commons is a pretty hoppin’ place. Having a gym and 2 restaurants (TGIFridays and Old Country Buffet)  help keep the crowds comin’.

Soon, this strip mall will lose its biggest store – Linens ‘N Things. Linens ‘N Things is closing all stores, and the Rosedale Commons location is no exception. How will we function without Linens N Things? Where will I buy my balsam & cedar decorative votives? How will I complete my Country Blue Ducks decor in my kitchen? I still need the matching lightswitch plate!

Next to Linens N Things is a Petsmart. Petsmart used to be a CompUSA, but again, the national chain closes up shop, and out of Rosedale Commons it goes. Maybe this place is cursed.

Linens N Things and Petsmart aren’t accessible from inside the mall. But the rest of the stores are. Let’s go inside!

Hallway

Sunlight streams through the hallway of Rosedale Commons. Bring the sunscreen!

At the far end of the mall is a Wells Fargo and a GameStop. There used to be a Chinese Buffet here too. Probably went out of business because of the Old Country Buffet a few yards down the hall. There’s only so many buffets one strip mall can handle, you know.

Going further down the hallway is an abandoned Ulta store.  Ulta and all of their

Ulta

This Ulta store is closed, but you can still get harassed for a "free" subscription to InStyle magazine when you visit their new location down the road.

uber-bitchy sales associates moved just down the road to the Crossroads Mall.  See you at the Crossroads!

Further down the hallway is Dena Marie Bridal and Tux. They’re always hauling out a bunch of misfit bridesmaid dresses on racks & having impromptu sidewalk sales. I guess that’s a good thing if you don’t mind having mismatched bridesmaid dresses at your wedding or if you’re in the market for a prom dress.

They also sell men’s tuxes and suits. Again, great for weddings and proms. This place is a madhouse around prom season. A bunch of 16-18 year old boys trying on $40 suits, acting like they’re hot shot businessmen CEO’s. Meh.

We’ve also got a Pearle Vision Center, Jenny Craig, Joann Fabrics, Urban Traveler, and a Juut Salon.

In the middle of the mall is a staircase leading to…THE BASEMENT. It’s not your typical creepy mall basement, like the one in Har Mar. The basement of this place has a women-only Lifetime Fitness and the mall office. It used to have a ballroom dance studio, but that closed a few years ago. Lifetime bought the space and expanded. Back when CompUSA was in this strip mall, the nerdy sales guys used to sneak down on their break and sit on the concrete steps to stare at the women working out. CREEPY. Lifetime has since blocked out the windows.

Basement

THE BASEMENT! Oooh SCARY!

I go to this Lifetime sometimes. I usually stick to the Lifetime closer to home, but every once in a while, I’ll go here for old time’s sake. I used to go here ALL.THE.TIME – they had some awesome classes here at one point in time (Tuesday 5:30PM step class, I miss you!!), but some of the instructors moved on or they moved the classes to a time when I cannot attend.  I’ve pretty much stopped going to the classes at Lifetime, so I go to the club by my house.  I’m going to the gym to run on the treadmill for an hour & listen to angry rap songs – any Lifetime will do. It’s actually much nicer facility too.

This is a very basic, bare-bones Lifetime. It’s basically cardio equipment, weight machines and some random group fitness classes.  If this is the main club you use, you’re probably better off getting a membership to Anytime Fitness for the price of this place. There is no pool, no snack bar, no rock climbing wall.  Just women and exercise equipment.

Back upstairs, a few more shops remain. A few places near the OCB wing of the mall closed.  Mega Media Xchange (aren’t they edgy, spelling their name with an X and all!?) – a place where you can sell back your used CDs, DVDs and video games. Looks like they moved all of their inventory over to

Mega Media Xchange has closed.

Mega Media Xchange - one of those places where you can trade in your entire DVD collection for a whopping 75 cents.

Blaine.  I doubt their Blaine location will stay in business very much longer either. These types of places are a dying breed. Soon, everything will be digital, and we won’t need to buy physical CDs and DVDs. These kinds of places attract those people who, in 2008, wave around their cell phone like it’s still a status symbol.

Why buy new when slightly used will do?

Why buy new when slightly used will do? Hmm...Tricky Dick's got me there. How can you argue with that?

Shinders closed too. The local porn peddler closed up shop in June 2007. Pretty sad — Shinders was the closest thing Roseville had to a Vegas-area brothel. The owner couldn’t afford to keep the stores operating — and along with that, he was facing drug charges.

Porn and drugs — not surprising. If he’s not in jail right now, you could probably find him blowing lines in the VIP room at Sheiks. Fuck, is there any Minnesota business owner who hasn’t had a brush with the law? Who’s next? My money’s on Dick Enrico. After all, he did that ad campaign with him looking like Baby Hitler…

Also on this end of the strip mall is an Oreck vacuum store. Vacuums are for losers. Real men and women use Roombas.

And then we come to the big daddy of Rosedale Commons. The Old Country Buffet. Yep, much like the Holly Center in Fridley, the Old Country Buffet is a big draw for this strip mall.

From their advertising and marketing, you’d think you were getting a homecooked meal from Ma at the farmhouse. In reality, you’re getting something more akin to what you’d find in a government-run cafeteria.

They have…

  • A meat station with a guy slicing the delicate cuts of roast beef, turkey, and ham. I guess he’s supposed to be the
    OCB

    If the Old Country Buffet closed, there'd be a line at Baker's Square at 3pm.

    chef. We’re supposed to believe that because he’s wearing a paper chef hat. Okay.

  • A pasta station. Lots of noodles soaking in neon orange cheese.  You can usually find cold pizza, brittle mashed potatoes, and sometimes *gasp* a makeshift taco bar.
  • A soda fountain with unlimited refills on various corn syrup drinks.  OCB doesn’t have a liquor license. They should get one – this place would be a trip if you were tipsy. Come to think of it, they should install TVs in here too.  Grandpa could sip a 7 & 7, gum on unlimited cinnamon rolls, and watch The Price is Right. What fun! But for now, bring a flask.
  • A dessert bar with various confections that have all the delicacy of a Hostess pie.
  • And the two decoys on which every buffet relies – a salad bar and a soft-serve ice cream station.

No matter how you decide to navigate the troughs, please, for the love of god, take a clean plate for every trip to the buffet. This isn’t a chuckwagon, you rouges!

Enough rules? What will this mall ban next, open toed shoes?

I don't think this mall has enough rules. What's next, no open toed shoes

Oh – one last thing to mention – these signs are plastered all over this mall, and without it, there would be pure anarchy.  Don’t pretend you’re Tony Hawk! Don’t light up! No Amway fliers! No selling boy scout wreaths! No horseplay or doing any of that other shit here or you will find yourself singing show tunes in prison. Where’s our freedom of expression? It’s like a police state here!

Enjoy the rest of the photos! All photos taken December, 2008.

ocb

If you think this is going to be like a Vegas-style buffet, think again. Most Vegas buffets aren't that great anyway, but at least they have sad-sap gambling-style decor to look at and an on-site bookie.

Rosedale Commons Hallway

Rosedale Commons Hallway

Dena Marie Bridal

Dena Marie Bridal

Taffeta dresses

Taffeta dresses, anyone?

Rosedale Commons

Don't let that beautiful pyramid statue in front of the door fool you into thinking you'll find classic pieces of art inside Rosedale Commons. It's just an ashtray.

Linens N Things

Linens N Things is going out of business. Why, it must be because of the SMOKING BAN. Isn't that what smokers always say whenever any business anywhere closes?

Going out of business

Going out of business

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Northtown Mall: Blaine, MN

The Northtown Mall gives off that high class, puttin on the Ritz kind of vibes

With MGM Liquor as a neighbor, the Northtown Mall gives off that high class, puttin' on the Ritz kind of vibe.

Now that the Minnesota State Fair is over, us Minnesotans will have to wait an entire YEAR before we can see Minnesota’s best mullets, rat-tails, and muffin-tops on parade.

Don’t deny it – we all know you’re not going to the fair to oogle the riding lawnmowers or fawn over all that informerical shit in the bazaar. Quit kidding yourself; you go there for the PEOPLE WATCHING. And when the Minnesota State Fair shuts down for the season, the people-watching side show also shuts down. So how’s a people-watching afficiando supposed to get their jollies the other 50 weeks of the year? Well folks, I have the answer.

Come to the Northtown Mall.

Along with Billy Big Mouth Bass and mounted deer heads, these moving light pictures are a popular decoration in the typical Northtown Mall patrons homes

Along with Billy Big Mouth Bass and mounted deer heads, these moving light pictures are a popular fixture in the local homes

Normally, youd see at least 3 camaros with flamed-out paint jobs in the parking lot. I mustve visited on an off day

Normally, you'd see several Camaros with flamed-out paint jobs in the parking lot. I must've visited on an off day

Serving the exquisite north suburban communities of Spring Lake Park, Fridley, Coon Rapids, and Blaine, the Northtown Mall naturally attracts some very interesting clientele. Common creatures include -

  • Mulleted men in wife-beaters with a round can popping out of the back pocket of the wranglers (Chicks dig that)
  • Pregnant teens
  • Toby Keith fans
  • Middle-aged ladies with bottle-blonde frizz, teased mall bangs standing 8 inches high, hot-pink nails, and a stained NASCAR t-shirt pushing a stroller with 5 screaming brats fighting over a bag of rapidly cooling Burger King french fries.
Burlington Coat Factory sells CLASS and STYLE to Northtown Mall shoppers

Burlington Coat Factory sells CLASS and STYLE to Northtown Mall shoppers

See, it’s just like the people-watching at the state fair! Only in an enclosed, climate-controlled enviroment, open year-round! What fun.

110 stores? Really? I think someones doing a little fuzzy math here...

110 stores? Really? I think someone's doing a little fuzzy math here... (photo taken August, 2007)

OH NOES!

OH NOES! (2008, Herberger's remodel)

Herbergers is coming to save the mall! And hopefully help the Northtown shoppers dress like their from this decade)

Herberger's is coming to save the mall! And hopefully help the Northtown shoppers dress like they're from this decade)

Northtown Mall is a one-level mall, which opened in 1972 with a whopping 33 stores. It was remodeled in 1988 and, at the time, had 120 stores. Prior to this renovation, I’ve read that this mall was very dark & dreary (probably very Brookdale-esque), but I never visited this mall until 1992. I was a tween in 1992, and the best part about going to the Northtown Mall was checking out Spencer Gifts, Mr. Bulky, and Woolworth’s for their selection of “RUSS” Troll Dolls. Actually, I shouldn’t include Woolworth’s on that list – they only sold the “Treasure Troll” brand Troll Dolls, which weren’t as desirable as the Russ trolls. Anyway.

So if Brookdale is the Twin Cities’ ghetto mall, then Northtown is its trashy counterpart. I wouldn’t quite say it’s in Brookdale Center dead mall territory yet, but it has seen its better days. This isn’t a mall around which you’d plan your entire afternoon – unless you’re people-watching.

A popular hangout for Northtown Mall workers to take a smoke break

A popular smoke break hangout for Northtown Mall workers

Northtown’s anchors have seen a lot of turnaround. Here’s how some of the anchors have changed (I am going completely by memory – if you have corrections, please let me know!)
Donaldsons (closed early 90s) > Carson Piere Scott (closed early 90’s) > Mervyn’s (Closed 2004) > empty space/hallway/Banks (sealed off early 2008) > Herbergers
MainStreet (closed 1989) > Kohls (closed Summer 2004) > Burlington Coat Factory
HomeGoods (Closed 2001) > Steve & Barry’s (opened 2003)
Montgomery Wards (closed 2001) > sealed off > demolished to make way for Home Depot
Woolworth (closed early ’90s) > Best Buy

Ahoy, mateys! For some reason, Northtown had somewhat of a pirate theme back in the day

Ahoy, mateys!

Another view of old skool Northtown signage

Another view of old skool Northtown signage

Other former non-anchor stores in the Northtown Mall include:
Applebee’s (now moved to a location in the middle of the mall parking lot)
Petite Sophisticate
Casual Corner
First Barber Stylists
Some pet store, next to the hair salon
Mr. Bulky
Picadelly Circus Arcade
Kay Bee Toys
…I honestly can’t remember any other stores. If you know of any, please let me know!

The old Mervyns location was converted into a mall hallway. This was sealed up in 2008 to make room for the Herbergers

The old Mervyn's location was converted into a mall hallway. This was sealed up in 2008 to make room for the Herbergers

Another view of the creepy hallway, July 2007

Another view of the creepy hallway, July 2007

In 2006, this was a Banks store for a little while

In 2006, this was a "Banks" store for a little while

Today, Northtown mall keeps chuggin’ along. In the past year, LA Fitness and Home Depot have set up shop, as well as a new Herberger’s store that’s expected to open within the month. Sure, it’s a trashy mall, but it has character, which many of the new malls simply do not have. In all honesty, it might not be the prettiest place, but it’s an okay-place to shop. It’s safe, has your typical mall offerings, and it usually isn’t terribly crowded (especially when NASCAR races are on the boob tube).

Enjoy the rest of the photos! (Photos taken August 2008)

This way to Steve & Barrys!!! Hurry, quick! Ill-fitting highwater olive green chinos are on sale! ONLY $8.98 (or less!) Supplies are limited!

This way to Steve & Barry's!!! Hurry, quick! Ill-fitting highwater olive green chinos are on sale! ONLY $8.98 (or less!) Supplies are limited!

Northtown Mall has a kids play area with equipment that looks like a giant piece of shit in a blue bowl

Northtown Mall has a kids play area with equipment that looks like a giant piece of dog shit atop a blue bowl

Creepy mall hallways have been scaring Northtown shoppers for decades

Creepy mall hallways have been frightening Northtown shoppers for decades

Lockers at the mall. WTF. I suppose if all the lockers at LA Fitness are in use, you can stuff your gym bag in here

Lockers at the mall. WTF. I suppose if all the lockers at LA Fitness are in use, you can stuff your gym bag in here

Applebees is closed. Youll have to walk across the parking lot to get your microwaved dinner, folks

Applebee's is closed. You'll have to walk across the parking lot to get your microwaved dinner, folks

Another view of the dead Applebees

Another view of the dead Applebee's

Ladies, if youre looking to flirt with the Federline-type, pick up your man at the Northtown Best Buy! Hubba, hubba!

Ladies, if you're looking to flirt with the Federline-type, pick up a man at the Northtown Best Buy! Hubba, hubba!

The Northtown Bath & Body Works still uses the old store front

The Northtown Bath & Body Works still uses the old store front

Along with B&BW, Express hasnt updated its signage in years either. A rare sight indeed!

Speaking of old store fronts, Express hasn't updated its signage since 1986! A rare sight indeed! "Camgainge Internationale"

This shiny blue tiled wall once housed the Picadelly Circus arcade, ripping off thousands of teens back in its heyday

This shiny blue tiled wall once housed the Picadelly Circus arcade, ripping off thousands of teens back in its heyday

At Victorias Secret, they just dont leave you alone until theyve chased you around the store a few times and forced a black shopping bag in your hand

At Victoria's Secret, they just don't leave you alone until they've chased you around the store a few times and forced a black shopping bag in your hand

Seduce your man by picking up some new lingerie at Victorias Secert

Seduce your man by picking up some new polka dot lingerie at Victoria's Secret. That's hot.

Upon entering Victorias Secret, a perky sales associate will chase you around the store, pestering you to apply for an Angels card

Upon entering Victoria's Secret, a perky sales associate will chase you around the store, pestering you to apply for an Angels card

Radio Shack is still in business. I bet you could even find a VHS deck inside, if you looked hard enough!

Radio Shack is still in business. I bet you could even find a VHS deck inside, if you looked hard enough!

Another view of the cosmopolitan food court

A picturesque view of the cosmopolitan food court

Northtowns recently renovated food court

Northtown's recently renovated food court

Which way to the Dollar Tree?

Which way to the Dollar Tree?

Nothing says class better than an outfit from DEB

Nothing says "class" better than an outfit from DEB

This is where Kohls used to be.

This is where Kohls used to be.

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Brookdale Mall: Brooklyn Center, MN

Even though their logo was updated, Brookdale keeps it real by keeping its original sign

Even though the mall logo was updated, Brookdale keeps it real by hanging on to its original sign

When it comes to Minnesota Malls, (other than the MOA), Minnesota is known for its “dales” – Ridgedale, Rosedale, Southdale…and then there’s Brookdale, the black sheep of the “Dales” family. While the other ‘Dales are known for their massive amounts of stores and stylish decor, this miscreant mall is known more for its perception of criminal activity than it is for its shopping activity.

You know your malls in trouble when The Mobile Phone Co. is listed on your giant sign

You know your mall's in trouble when "The Mobile Phone Co." is listed on your giant sign

Growing up in Brooklyn Center, this is where we shopped. Even with its dowdy, dreary decor and strange coffee smell wafting through the air, I thought this place was the be-it-all, end-it-all of malls. I didn’t know any better – my parents never took us to Southdale or Rosedale because “they’re too far away.” I guess when you live in Brooklyn Park, a 10 mile drive to Edina is just too remote of a trek to go to a mall when there’s Brookdale in your backyard. Brookdale is the smallest of the ‘dales with only one level (because it was built over a swamp), so when my parents finally took me to Southdale, I thought I was in fucking Disneyland.

Brookdale was known for its Giant wooden rafters on the ceiling and a faux cobblestone flooring *photo courtesy of MN Hist Society*

Brookdale was known for its giant wooden rafters and faux cobblestone flooring *photo courtesy of MN HistSociety*

Leave that fountain shit to the Bellagiao.

I don't know what the hell this decoration is supposed to be. It looks like a faux stone/cement intermix retaining wall with a fountain in the middle. Except there's no water. Note to Brookdale architects: Leave the fountain shit to the Bellagiao.

The Sears exterior, in the 1960s *photo courtesy of MN HistSociety*

The Sears exterior, in the 1960s *photo courtesy of MN HistSociety*

Brookdale never had the glowing reputation that, say, Southdale did, but it was a safe, decent place to shop. It had between 70-80 stores, a few restaurants, strong anchor stores, and up until 1992, you could smoke in designated areas within the mall. Dad could light up a ciggy and puff away to his lungs’ content, on a bench in the commons outside of Dayton’s while Mom and the kids shopped for back-to-school clothes! Yep. Brookdale Center was fun for the whole family.

How Sears stays in business is beyond me

How Sears stays in business is beyond me

Take your ride in for a tune-up at the Sears Auto Center. Theyll get you in & out quickly, so you can get back on the road & ridin dirty

Take your ride in for a tune-up at the Sears Auto Center. They'll get you in & out quickly, so you can get back on the road & ridin' dirty

Throughout the ’90s, the suburb’s demographics changed dramatically, and as a result, Brookdale tenants started deserting the mall. At the beginning of the ’90s, Brookdale was a passable place to spend an afternoon with a good selection of stores. At the end of the ’90s, it had turned into a creepy, dreary locale. If you absolutely HAD to go to Brookdale, you didn’t want to spend any time “hanging out” – get in, get out, and make sure not to leave any valuables in your car. Thank goodness Brookdale has lockers.

Dont want your three-finger ring to get ganked? Detain up your valueables in Brookdales rusty 1960s lockers.

Don't want your four-finger ring to get ganked? Detain your valuables in Brookdale's rusty 1960's lockers.

In case you get lost...

In case you get lost...

A major renovation was completed in 2004, including an addition to the mall. This transformation was supposed to help the mall get back on its feet. The tiles and the ceilings were given a makeover to help give the mall a brighter ambiance. The renovation draw new tenants to the mall – among those were Gap, Old Navy, and Barnes & Noble – but it didn’t help. Stores continued to vacate the property.

More empty storefronts of this woebegone shopping center

More empty storefronts of this woebegone shopping center

Prior to its renovation, the mall did not have a food court. Restaurants were scattered all around the mall, so if you were there with a group of friends, and one person wanted Rocky Rococo, one wanted Baskin Robbins, and another wanted Subway, your group would have to branch out all around the mall.

That said, the closet Brookdale had to a food court was a Taco Bell and a frozen yogurt stand (I think it was owned by Daytons) in the middle of the mall, near the tent stores – 2+2 and Piercing Pagoda, and some stationary store) They had a few tables and chairs, but it certainly was not your traditional food court.

Brookdale boasts of having a Kohls store. As if! In reality, the Kohls store is across the street.

Brookdale boasts of having a Kohls store. As if! Time to come back from Make-Believe Land, Brookdale! In reality, the Kohls store is across the street.

Today, there is no reason to go to the Brookdale Mall, unless you have a taste for danger and like urbanwear, fake “gold” that will turn your skin green, dollar store shit, and knockoff sunglasses. You won’t even find many of your typical mall chain stores here. Many of the stores are shady local businesses lured into the mall by the cheap rent.

Fashion-forward Steve & Barrys will make your whole family look straight out of 1998

Fashion-forward Steve & Barry's will make your whole family look straight out of 1998

Amazingly, two of the mall’s anchors – Macy’s (formerly Dayton’s/Marshall Fields) and Sears – are still around today.

Brookdale isn’t much of a destination for shopping anymore as it is for loitering and mall walking. Early in the morning, you can see elderly people holding 1lb neon handweights walking laps around the mall. As the day goes on, Grandma leaves to go play Canasta and in come the baby mamas, teens skipping school, and hoodlums packing heat.

Just your typical day at the Brookdale Mall *photo courtesy of WCCO*

Nothing to see here - just your typical day at the Brookdale Mall *photo courtesy of WCCO*

The perception of crime at Brookdale is probably worse than ACTUAL crime. It stays out of the local 10pm newscasts, so I guess that’s a good thing. In recent years, the only newsworthy item from the mall was in 2005, when a tween riot broke out over some boyband no one’s ever heard of.

Helpful parking lot animals will direct you to your car

Helpful parking lot animals will direct you to your car

I’ve read articles of yet ANOTHER renovation coming Brookdale’s way, with perhaps a Home Depot, Wal-Mart, and an LA Fitness coming to save the day. In my opinion, Brookdale’s day in the sun has come and gone. No amount of home improvement centers or chain gyms is going to save it, so might as well tear it down and build some condos ;)

Just outside the mall, Applebees tempts shoppers with their delicious menu of reheated entrees

Just outside the mall, Applebees tempts shoppers with their delicious menu of reheated entrees

A list of FORMER stores in Brookdale:
1 Potato 2
American Eagle
Arby’s
An arcade
B. Dalton:
Bachman’s: Closed 1994
Bakers Shoe Store: Closed prior to 1990
Baskin Robbins
Bath & Body Works: Opened in 1996, closed in winter 2008.
Brauns
Bridgeman’s Ice Cream
Brookdale Pet Center: Closed prior to 1990
Burger King: Closed in 1995
Carlton Cards
Champs
Contempo Casuals
Daytons/Marshall Fields
Dejaiz (young men’s clothing)
Donaldsons: Turned into a Carson Pierie Scott in 1987, then later into a Mervyn’s in 1995. Mervyn’s closed in 2004 and has remained empty since.
Duling Optical
Fanny Farmer
Foot Locker
Forever 21: Opened 2004, closed 2008
Fredelle Shoes: Closed prior to 1990
FYE
Ganger’s Hobby Store
Gantos: Closed 1991
GAP: Opened ’00s, closed 2005
Glamour Shots: Closed in 1995
Gloria Jeans Coffee Beans: This place alone gave the Brookdale Mall its distinct smell of day-old coffee
Golddiggers
Gordan’s Jewelers
Hal’s (men’s wear): Closed prior to 1990
Hallmark: Closed early ’00s
Haugland’s for Kids: Closed prior to 1990
Helzberg Diamonds
J. Riggans
Jarman Shoes
JC Penny’s: Currently a Steve & Barry’s. Went out of business in Feb. 2004
Jo-Ann Fabrics: Closed prior to 1990
Kay Bee Toys: Closed in 1995
Lady Foot Locker
Lechters Housewares
Limited: Closed Summer 2007
Maurices
Milton’s Bridal: Closed prior to 1990
Mr. Bulky: Opened around 1992/1993. Closed: ??
Musicland
National Uniform: Closed prior to 1990
Northern Reflections: Closed 2001
Old Navy: Opened ’00s. Closed 2006
Piercing Pagoda
Pinstripes Petites
Pipe Seller: Closed prior to 1990
The Record Shop
Rocky Rococo Pizza: Closed prior to 1990. It was awesome – 2 stories tall!
Sbarro: Closed in 1995
Snyders: Closed in 1991.
Stride Rite
Stuarts
Susie’s Casuals: Closed prior to 1990
The Closet
The Eye Guys
The Limited: Closed August 2007
The Wooden Bird
Things Remembered
Trade Secrets Salon
Two Plus Two
Wicks N Sticks
Wilson’s Leather
Wonderful World of Pets
Wrangler Roost

This used to be the Old Navy. Brookdale shoppers will now need to go to Maple Grove to get their Performance Fleece

This used to be the Old Navy. Brookdale shoppers will now need to go to Maple Grove to get some Performance Fleece

A few of the CURRENT stores in Brookdale:
AJ LOMAX Famous Labels
Barnes & Noble
Big Harry Deals (WTF??)
Boba Café
Champs Sports
Charlotte Russe
d.e.m.o
Footlocker
GNC
Golden Razor
Journeys
K Fashion
Macy’s
Orange Julius
Payless Shoe Source
Sears
Steve & Barry’s
T-Moblie
TwinsTown
Victoria’s Secret

ENJOY the rest of the photos!

***Updated 9.2.08: Steve & Barry’s is closing, but no word yet on an exact date. Another one bites the dust!

Inside the enterance at the Brookdale Mall

Inside the entrance at the Brookdale Mall

Wet Seal, in the former Contempo Casuals location

Wet Seal, in the former Contempo Casuals location

Duck & Cover

From a distance, this mall looks quite quaint

Lord knows what lurks down the creepy yellow hallway...

Lord knows what lurks down the creepy yellow hallway...

The closed Mervyns store

The closed Mervyn's store

Duck & Cover

Brookdale Mall: Duck & Cover

Barnes & Nobel is the busiest store at the mall

Barnes & Noble is the busiest store at the mall

Sears has been in this mall since Day 1. Now thats loyalty!

Sears has been in this mall since Day 1. Now that's loyalty!

Best thing about the Brookdale Mall? There are no Dead Sea Salt people to harrass you

Best thing about the Brookdale Mall? There are no "Dead Sea Salt" people to harass you

One of these stores used to house Mr. Bulky - were you could ALWAYS find something worth getting fat over

You will not find an Abercrombie & Fitch lurking around the corner in this mall

Its no surprise that this cell phone kiosk is the busiest spot in the mall. In the background, a closed Forever 21 (Formerly MAURICES)

It's no surprise that this cell phone kiosk is the busiest spot in the mall. In the background, a Forever 21 (now closed. Formerly MAURICES) *photo courtesy of T-Mobile*

Shop at Steve & Barrys for the $8 fashions of Sarah Jessica Parker

Shop at Steve & Barry's for the $8 fashions of Sarah Jessica Parker.

The Brookdale Food Court has plenty of tables, just in case.

The Brookdale Food Court has plenty of tables, just in case.

Another view of the spacious food court

Another view of the spacious food court

Bath & Body Works is closed, depriving Brookdales DOZENS of shoppers of the joys of Cucumber Melon and Sun Ripened Raspberry

Bath & Body Works is closed, depriving Brookdale's DOZENS of shoppers of the joys of Cucumber Melon and Sun Ripened Raspberry

Victorias Secret is one of the few national chains still left in this mall

Victoria's Secret is one of the few national chains still left in this mall

To my surprise, TwinsTown is closed.

To my surprise, TwinsTown is closed.

A labelscar of the Brookdale Mervyns

A labelscar of the Brookdale Mervyn's

Updated 12.15.08 – NEW PHOTO! Found this in one of my old photo albums and thought my readers would like to see this – note the slight change in the mall exterior. Sears now has a white exterior, JC Penny’s is now an empty Steve and Barry’s, and the blue & white building (an auto repair place) has since been demolished)

July, 1994 at Centerbrook Golf Course (the golfer is my brother). Brookdale Mall is in the background

July, 1994 at Centerbrook Golf Course (the golfer is my brother). Brookdale Mall is in the background

UPDATE: 01.09.09: The Brookdale Macy’s is closing. No word yet on an exact date. With another anchor leaving, Brookdale Center is headed for the guillotine.

Blog Widget by LinkWithin

Tags: , , , ,